


The Blue Lady

by BlackRitual



Series: Found You Again - YuujixNagisa [2]
Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Crossdressing, First chapter highly nsfw but the rest not so much, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Waaaaaaaaaaaaay long-term, assassinations (offscreen), two other members of Class E show up at one point in a very minor way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-02 16:12:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6573058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackRitual/pseuds/BlackRitual
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On that island, Nagisa had been the cutest girl Yuuji had ever met. Then, he was the cutest guy that Yuuji had ever met. Then they were boyfriends. Then they fell apart. Seven years and lifetime later, Yuuji and Nagisa meet again at a hotel, where an assassin known as the Blue Lady is scheduled to make an appearance. After everything comes together, what will be left for them?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You / Me Time

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, and welcome! If you're confused about what this fic is, you might want to check out Found You Again, the prequel to it. Don't worry; even though it's kinda long, it's a light read. Reading Found You Again is not necessary to enjoy this story, but it will make the events contained within here make a lot more sense.
> 
> Yuuji Norita is that one guy who developed a crush on Nagisa during the crossdressing chapter/episode in the summer island arc. Yeah, that two-shot character. I thought he had a lot of potential, and now here we are.
> 
> NOTICE: My Yuujigisa fanfiction is meant to kinda float outside of the canon timeline, but if I had to place this fic, I would put it *halfway* through the final chapter of the manga. Basically, imagine the Class E kids are all adults and taking care of their mountain, but Nagisa did not go on to become a teacher right away. He made…a different choice instead. Another 2 years went by, during which the Class E kids began to settle into their careers. Basically, this takes place during the time skip, but in a slightly AU fashion where the skip is more extended.
> 
> I am so excited to begin this new adventure, and I hope you all enjoy!
> 
> [!! A non-Explicit (read: cutaway/fade-to-black) version of this chapter is on Fanfiction.net due to that site's different policies, so if you would prefer a fluffier version of the final scene instead, I invite you to follow this link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11900000/1/The-Blue-Lady !!]]

Seven years was a long time.

Yuuji Norita sat alone in his hotel room. The room was expansive and quiet around him, all of the trappings and furniture in their places, all noises hushed. The walls were a comforting shade of brown. Dim lamps lined them at certain points, sending out small halos of light. Emptiness fueled a stark silence. The air hung still around the room, _dead_ , listless motes floating at the edge of Yuuji's vision and making it feel for just a moment as if he himself were not the only thing holding its breath.

This place was well-furnished, as lavish as any service he was used to. Without even looking, Yuuji knew he could name each and every one of the features—a coffee table, chairs with velvet cushions, a bookshelf, a full kitchen unit, this couch. As expected from a premier hotel. But it was all too quiet. The room's sole occupant had not unpacked, leaving the bedspread bare. Everything lay where it always had, tables looming lifeless, empty, waiting for somebody to breathe personality back into them with use. But Yuuji hadn't touched a thing.

Everything was dark and subdued in the low light. Yuuji hadn't bothered to turn the lights all the way up yet, having been more focused on settling in. Or not settling in, but on moving in. On just…being here. Ready. And now that he was seated, Yuuji found it impossible to move.

Yuuji took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Briefly, he had the childish thought of worrying about how he looked. He hadn't changed much over the years—at least, Yuuji didn't feel like he had. He still had short, black hair, the bangs hanging in front of his face. His eyes were dark, and slightly too narrow. He had forgone the baseball cap, at least. It wasn't even lying within view. It felt a bit strange to go without one, but he had thought that he should dress up a bit for the occasion. Yuuji picked at his collar for a moment. Thus, the white shirt and tie.

Sweat dotted the back of his neck. Yuuji's torso stayed rigid, the man's gaze focused on nothing. He blinked. Nothing. He saw nothing. His hands were clasped, elbows resting atop his knees. Beneath them, one leg began to jiggle, tapping out an unsteady rhythm.

At last, Yuuji brought one hand up to scratch the back of his head. He was nervous. Immediately, he became angry at himself for being nervous. Why the hell was he so slightly nervous, like a jumping in the stomach and a forgetful restraightening of the table doily a thousand times?

 _Ah, yes,_ his mind supplied. It was because today was the day he would finally see Nagisa.

Here, sitting alone inside the vacant hotel room, Yuuji had plenty of time to swim through the dredge of his old memories. How he had first met Nagisa, the figure of a beautiful girl in black-and-pink dancing through his memory and then fading, replaced by a person more solid and somehow, impossibly, even more stunning. The warm sight of a smile that he had been unable to ever forget. The surprise on the other boy's face when Yuuji had shown up at that fall festival. The blush on his cheeks. The steel in the boy's eyes when he told Yuuji he was training for an assassination. The words that Yuuji had said afterward, and the texts and messages that followed. The warmth always found in the other boy's hands. Nagisa and him, laughing together. Sharing their first sortof-date. Their first kiss. Nagisa and him, standing side-by-side after the world had been threatened and then saved. Nagisa. Nagisa. Always Nagisa.

And then- Yuuji's fingers twitched. He didn't know what happened. They were dating for a while, and it seemed as if those happy days would last forever. But then the messages slowed. Life got frantically busy. Adulthood loomed, and in the face of it, Nagisa seemed to slowly vanish.

A pang shot through Yuuji's heart as it always did when he remembered this part. They were together all through high school—albeit, growing a bit distant towards the end, Yuuji would admit—but college had been a different story. Communication with Nagisa became scarcer and scarcer. Yuuji had hung on, holding faith even in the cold grasp of limbo. While everyone around him seemed to find a soulmate and fell in love, he drifted through life as if made of ice. He concentrated on schoolwork instead, earning stellar grades. Meanwhile, there was barely a text. No calls. By the end of Yuuji's senior year, it had whittled down to no contact at all.

Yuuji allowed a rare scowl to twist across his face. He had tried to discover where the boy went, of course. Nagisa never did tell him what he had ended up deciding on. But Yuuji's suspicions were confirmed once he investigated and found that Nagisa never attended Keio University, the one connected to his high school. The boy never even filled out the application.

Yuuji struggled to shake off a persistent thought—at that point, had they really even been dating?

With a sigh, he settled back against the couch seat. Their days had passed like sand through an hourglass, Yuuji reflected dimly, beautiful in their moments but always ticking down towards some inevitable, immeasurable end. Yuuji realized that now. Like many things, it had been impossible to notice while standing in the middle of it all. But looking back, he could see things all too well.

Their relationship had always been fast. And now it was just excruciatingly slow.

Dear god, when he thought of including these last couple years, it was probably more like nine years in total. Yuuji ran one hand through his hair. Nine years since they had first met, nine _goddamn years._ And the last five without seeing each other once. What did that do to a person? What did that do to a relationship?

A year was a long time. Being without someone meant months worth of holidays passing by, unshared. It meant staring at the weather outside, slowly watching as it shifted and cycled and knowing that the person you were thinking of probably wasn't coming back. It meant the number twelve on the calendar, then nine, six, four. And still they weren't here. It was each component of time filled to the brim with an empty ache. A year was a whole chapter in one's life. People measured their existence out in years. You only had a certain amount of them, and every time that number changed, you changed too. The weeks that passed, each of them made up of days, made up of crawling, anguishing hours, made up of minutes, made up of seconds, each one without that one specific person. The passage was agony. Until then, one morning, you managed to look back and realized that scores of time had passed. New Year's would arrive. Cold, confused, and alone. Would there be something from them this year? Who knows. Then it was time to start over and begin it all again.

 _Imagine doing that five times_ , Yuuji buried his head in both hands, rocking forward and back slightly, resting his elbows on his knees. _Imagine doing that for five years straight_. Upon reflection, he didn't know how he could stand it.

And yet—Yuuji's stomach flopped in recognition—he couldn't bring himself to be angry when he thought of Nagisa. In contrast, he felt… nervous. Excited, even. What little hope he had left collected into a spark and was glowing there somewhere inside his chest. It felt like anticipation.

From that change in Yuuji's thoughts, the mood shifted. A morose silence fell over the couch. Still, what would he do? Yuuji thought, wishing he could be angry instead of carrying this damned subtle eagerness. What would he say? Did the boy—no, he would be a man now—even deserve his words? Should he just be silent and hope that the illusion of anger would unearth some kind of explanation? ...Did he even want an explanation?

In the back of his head hovered the most painful question. Yuuji tried to ignore it, but the words kept coming up again and again, rising from the spot where they had always been hidden in the back of Yuuji's mind: Was I not good enough?

So many questions, filling him to the brim like water until he felt like a cup threatening to overflow. Yuuji's leg began tapping against the floor again. The questions just wouldn't stop. What have you been doing for these past five years or so? Will you be different now? Why do I still want to see you?

He reached out and adjusted the doily on the table.

Well, Yuuji knew the answer to the last one at least, he admitted. It was because he loved Nagisa. And no, Yuuji wasn't afraid to say it anymore. It took him so long to own up to it the first time that he had sworn he would never deny it again.

He let out another sigh, staring down at the table surface. Why now? he thought, confusion twisting inside of his brain. Why do you want to see me now of all times? And do I still want to see you?

That was a pointless question too, Yuuji chided himself. Of course he did. Otherwise, he wouldn't have accepted that invitation the moment he read it, fingers closing hard around the cellphone as if he feared losing that text message to the wind, wouldn't have sent back a Yes the moment his eyes had finished reading, like an almost unconscious reaction, an instinct burned deep into his bones. He wouldn't have that very same cellphone resting out on the table right now, its black case seeming to return his gaze.

Finally, Yuuji looked aimlessly off to the side. He felt his thoughts relax at the change in focus. The tan color of the carpet spread across the floor beneath him. All was quiet. All was still. The fixtures hung silent all around.

With a slow, bittersweet lurch, the thought occurred to Yuuji that the spring break after middle school was probably the only time he had ever felt truly happy.

_Clack._

At that moment, a noise sounded on the other side of the room. Yuuji's gaze whipped around.

It had come from the window. As Yuuji watched, the latch wiggled once, tilting side to side experimentally before going still. There was a slight tapping noise, as if the lock were being tested. Judging by the tone, it was done by a deft, experienced hand. Blinds hanging across the pane of glass made it impossible to tell what lay beyond. What _was_ on the other side? Yuuji raced to recall. A ledge? The fire escape?

The sound had set Yuuji's every sense ablaze, his mind wide awake before thoughts of it had even registered. Belatedly, he shot to his feet. He didn't know what was happening. Was it a robber, come to break into the room? Or- It couldn't be. Panic tightened in his throat. No, no, this was still too fast, even with all this impossible time, he didn't feel ready-

The bottom windowsill pulled up in one smooth motion to let a blue shape tumble inside.

Nagisa Shiota crouched there against the hotel room floor. His lower body was braced, boots heavy against the carpet with the rest of him poised still. A soft expression of something almost like surprise lingered on his face, the light of concentration just beginning to fade from his eyes. Blue hair framed his face in soft tufts.

The young man was dressed all in black, the line of his shirt and pants nearly blending together. His outfit was overall practical, hugging close to his figure, yet casual enough to fit in on the streets outside if need be. Across his shoulders were the straps of a small pitch-black backpack, which he let slide to the floor in a gesture that looked almost automatic.

He looked up. Twin blue eyes met surprised brown. A light smile danced across the young man's lips. "Found you," Nagisa said, breathless.

Yuuji couldn't find the words to reply. Every action, every word, each plan, every single variation of how Yuuji imagined he might respond flew out the window in the face of the actual Nagisa.

Nagisa stood. He brushed the brick dust off of his hands with all the motion of an afterthought. For some reason, Yuuji's attention focused on that detail.

For a short while they just stood in place, with the occasional shuffle from foot to foot. One glance would be returned by another, lasting for only a moment before its owner looked away shyly. Yuuji wondered if Nagisa was thinking the same things that he was. This felt different. _They_ looked different now, each of them projecting and possessing not quite the same feeling that they had before. They stood before each other like two puzzle pieces subtly trying to gauge whether they would still fit. A semi-awkward silence began to grow as they stood, both getting used to the other's new height, new stature, new appearance and voice.

"It's good to see you," Yuuji finally gathered together a sentence.

Nagisa nodded quietly. "It's good to see you too."

Yuuji's gaze lingered on the person that Nagisa was now. He stood short, noticeably shorter than Yuuji, when beforehand Yuuji had barely been able to see over the top of the other boy's head. His limbs were still slender, but Yuuji knew that they must hold enough strength for the other man to make his way up here. And even after all this time, Nagisa still hadn't really cut his hair. It looked much the same as Yuuji had seen it last. As if the young man, too, had stayed frozen in time. The length of it was a bit shorter perhaps, but still tied up in a fashion able to pass for either girl or guy.

A thrum shot unbidden through Yuuji's heart. Nagisa had no idea what sort of effect that would have on him, did he? Or maybe he did. Maybe that, too, was all part of his plan.

Nagisa looked up and gave him a shy smile. "So. Yuuji." The young man's voice was awkward on the syllables, unconfident and rusty with disuse. But still, Yuuji couldn't stop a trill from running through him at the sound. His name. Nagisa still remembered his name. "You look well."

Yuuji cleared his throat and dipped his head. "You too."

Nagisa stood with one hand folded over the other, gripping at the wrist. The tense grip was making his fingers tremble slightly, or maybe that was just Yuuji's imagination? Though Yuuji kept his gaze down, out of the corner of his eye he could always just barely make out the blue halo of Nagisa's hair. He watched as the young man shifted to the other foot. "Been taking care of yourself?" Nagisa asked.

Yuuji shrugged.

A frown slipped momentarily across Nagisa's face. "Look, I… I really appreciate you being here tonight."

"Wouldn't have missed it for the world."

Yuuji shut his mouth. That remark had slipped out far too quickly. Both of them paused.

"So, you did become an assassin," Yuuji ventured once a few uncomfortable seconds had passed.

"Yes," Nagisa replied. His eyes glinted. He said nothing more.

"And that's why you're here tonight."

This time Nagisa nodded to confirm. "My assignment is someone in the very high echelons of politics," he explained. "They won't be in a place like this for another few months. I needed your social rank and resources in order to reserve a prime spot." He seemed to relax a little at the restatement of his task, steepling his fingers in front of himself. "Thanks to your support, the odds of me succeeding have gone up a considerable percent."

Yuuji felt the other man's remarks slide up against his subconscious. _Oh,_ he thought. _I see._ _I knew it._

Yuuji remained quiet while Nagisa slowly began to take notice of the rest of the room, wandering around before drifting over to explore the bookshelves. The young man seemed fascinated with the slight traces of Yuuji's life that were already scattered throughout the area—a faint imprint left on the couch cushion, the table doily lying tilted at an angle, his luggage stowed halfway under the bed.

Eventually, Yuuji cleared his throat to catch attention. He folded his hands behind his back and straightened up. When he spoke, his voice was all-business. "What can I help you with, Nagisa?"

Nagisa flinched at the impersonal tone. And as long-awaited as that was, Yuuji found that he could derive no satisfaction from it. "'H-help me' with?" Nagisa repeated, body turning towards Yuuji. The bookshelf served as a background to his face as Yuuji watched the man's expression fall. "Oh, no. It's not like that, Yuuji," Nagisa protested, his voice growing strained. "It was never like that. That's not why I'm here."

For a moment, the look in his eyes was so fervent that Yuuji almost believed him. Yuuji tried to steel himself. But he couldn't help it. He had always been good at judging peoples' faces, at seeing right through every bit of faked emotion, every trace of deception and lies. That was something he had developed since even before his time with Nagisa.

But strangely enough, here Nagisa's desperate gaze seemed as genuine as all of his others before.

Yuuji let out a huff. He looked away, deciding to trust in their shared past for a moment. Every time he had seen this boy smile at him, every time Nagisa had said to look at his face if Yuuji thought that he was lying, things had turned out for the best. So Yuuji stayed quiet, not denying the young man's claim, simply letting those words hang empty in the air.

"True, I… I realized that I could use you as a contact in order to reach the best possible chance of success," Nagisa continued. "That was why I contacted you. And that was probably wrong of me. But that's… Oh, Yuuji, that wasn't all."

"I mean, hasn't it been long enough?" He gave a weak, breathy laugh. Nagisa dipped his head in embarrassment as a light blush rose to his cheeks. "I…wanted to see you."

The platitude was so cliché Yuuji's mind couldn't even spare a moment to consider it. "Why now?" Yuuji snapped. His voice held more bite in it than he had expected, but after a second, Yuuji decided that he welcomed the change.

Nagisa winced. He didn't answer.

Then, finally, a soft reply. "I figured you of all people would understand."

Quietness descended upon the room.

"You left." Yuuji's cracked voice broke the silence. "You left for five years." He could feel himself struggling to keep up the stern façade, his eyes shining with something that must have looked like tears and his lips pressed together in tortured, thin lines. "Not a word from you, Nagisa, for the last _two_. It's been two goddamn years since I heard more than a 'hello' or a 'not now'."

"You missed college. You missed my first year and my start at…" Yuuji took a shaky breath. "I had wanted to share those moments with you."

Yuuji screwed his eyes shut and scowled. God _dammit_. As much as he tried, it seemed that he was unable to say anything out of rage to Nagisa. It was all coming out sad instead. He couldn't hold anything in his heart beyond regret and a dull anguish. He had loved him. He loved him.

This was the man he still loved.

Nagisa looked at Yuuji with a mixture of sadness and something an awful lot like pity. Slowly, the young man's mouth opened. "Do you remember," he spoke, "how you once told me that you worried you might be only a distraction?"

"Yes," Yuuji mumbled. His tone said much more: _And maybe I was, if you were able to just go and leave for more than five years all on your own._

"Well, it's not true." Nagisa gave a small smile, and even that tiny gesture looked to Yuuji like the sun come to wash away layers of cloud. "I never considered you that, Yuuji. You were never unimportant in my mind. It might have looked that way to an outsider—how you just showed up out of nowhere and kept getting entangled with my life. But I welcomed every moment of it. You were a calming influence on me, and, well, an endearing reminder of what I was fighting for." Nagisa's voice grew fond with thought. "It was what I needed. What I…might still need."

"I've said it once and I'll say it again, Yuuji: You were never a burden. Never a side story. Not to me. For those few months and years that we were together, you were my everything."

Nagisa narrated all this as he walked closer, gradually making his way across the room. It didn't take him all the way. But it did at least get him to the half-way point. He took one of the chairs from the nearby table and sat down. "In all of these years, you were the one thing that I couldn't get out of my head. Hell, I almost thought about you too much. I wondered how you were doing, what life was like and how you might be feeling. I promised myself that if I ever made it out, if I was ever able to do the impossible in this business, your house would be the first place that I'd run to. I wanted to send you messages, but some part of me worried that it was too dangerous. That even though I was confident in my skills, there was always someone out there who could be even better, and no matter how great my powers were, I worried that they might not be enough to protect you."

"I never forgot you, Yuuji," Nagisa said, his gaze open and honest as he looked up. "But I know that's not enough."

Yuuji's fist hung heavy at his side. No, it wasn't enough, he thought. But still, he couldn't bring himself to deny that it might be something like a start.

Nagisa smiled softly then, and before Yuuji knew it the two of them got to talking. They talked about their lives, Yuuji finding himself drawn deep into conversation. At some point, he pulled up another chair. They talked about how they had been. The things they had done. What it had been like to go away for college, and what it was like to live mostly abroad for years at a time.

"I'm a newsanchor for one of the major stations in Tokyo," Yuuji said. "It's a pretty good job. Actually, I really like it. The only tricky part is having to be on camera, but as it turns out, I kinda developed a talent for that too after so many years of living with my dad." He shrugged. "Still go by my mom's last name, though. Wouldn't want people thinking I bought my way in with my father's influence or anything."

"What? No way." Nagisa's eyes widened in a way that was almost childishly cute. "That's really cool. So you get to be on TV? I'm so happy for you."

Yuuji shrugged, unable to resist a bashful smirk. Heh. It seemed pretty funny for an assassin to be admiring a position so solidly in the limelight. Wouldn't Nagisa prefer a place swathed in shadows? "And you?" Yuuji asked. He raised an eyebrow to point out Nagisa's outfit. "Apparently you went the path of Class E after all."

Nagisa paused momentarily. "Yes," he admitted. "I became an assassin." He raised both hands, looking at them as if he were picturing something else hidden within them. "After assassinating Korosensei, I…couldn't get the idea out of my head. That one year held so many events and taught us so much. It seemed… _wrong_ somehow to just let it all go. And so I got to thinking… Well, that this might be what I was best suited for."

He gripped his knees. "When I was given the chance, right out of high school, I took it. There was no other way I'd get to learn for real. There was no other way I'd be able to use all the skills that we worked so hard to learn."

The young man looked up for a moment. "Does that seem selfish?"

Yuuji blinked, taken aback by the question. "No," he answered truthfully. "I can understand. You were just drawn to whatever career you felt would make you most satisfied. That's what everyone tries to do, I think."

Nagisa nodded quietly. "After successfully finishing the Korosensei assassination," he continued, a moment of sadness flashing across his face at the mention of the teacher's name, "we were all set for life. They gave us a huge cash reward, and while we returned most of it, each of us kept an amount that we thought would be enough to allow us to live life to the fullest. So I…" He took a breath. "That's part of why I was able to skip town. I could go travel, work around the world for a little while, buying my own equipment and doing everything I needed to do in order to ease myself into the business. Besides, some people were expecting me to come. I have….connections in that world." Yuuji tried to ignore the excited shiver that went down his spine at the young man's words.

"My pseudonym is Shoreline, or the Tide, or something like Edge," Nagisa continued, a certain amount of pride evident in his voice. "It suits me, see?"

Yuuji nodded. A wordplay off of the kanji for Nagisa's name. Clever. Most of those foreigners probably wouldn't even get it.

Nagisa bounced suddenly in his seat, all excitement. "But enough about me. Do you still have that food blog?"

Yuuji blinked. He recognized what the young man was talking about. That review site Yuuji had set up out of boredom, flying around to restaurants and doing food tasting. _Diaries of a Travelling Bon-bon_ …now that brought back memories. "No," he admitted. "I shut that old thing down long ago. It kinda fell out of popularity, due to the fickle nature of the internet. And, well…to be honest, the useless talent of a fifteen-year-old wasn't something that should have been dragged out for long. My interests started to change."

Nagisa's smile faded. "Oh. Well, I bet you still have that amazing palate, at least."

Yuuji flashed a smirk. "If you need any recommendations, I'm your guy. Consider it a one-man review hub just for you." Try as he might, he couldn't stop the end of that sentence from reaching up in a flirtatious lilt.

"What about that funny dancing?" Nagisa said. "There might be club somewhere in this place where you can polish your moves."

"Ah, no." Yuuji coughed. "Actually…it's been a while. Since I was in a place like that."

"Oh."

Silence fell, but not for long. Whether due to his assassin training or not, Nagisa was good at picking up conversation.

The young man smiled at Yuuji. His eyes suddenly seemed to hold a gentler light. "Remember how we used to play?" his voice came. "I'm pretty sure you followed me into multiple dark alleys back then. Freerunning practice, was it?"

To his own surprise, a smile tugged at the corners of Yuuji's mouth. "Heh. Yeah, it was parkour."

"That was it! And what about that sleepover? That was fun." Nagisa frowned in thought. "Or maybe we had two…"

"I was gonna ask," Yuuji chuckled. "Which one?"

They continued, picking out memories from their childhoods and going over them. Parkour, visiting each other's houses, walking home together after school occasionally, Yuuji's hat collection, remember that one story about your dad, the tutoring session at Yuuji's house, that time you climbed a telephone pole, finding a lost cat—do you still have those allergies, by the way? man, that sucks—the whole substitute teacher fiasco, and how I bet you're much stronger now.

Their conversation was broken by occasional laughter, both of them caught up in simply enjoying each other's presence. Yuuji noticed that his posture had long since relaxed. His stomach leaped. Dear god. For a moment, this felt just like old times. He watched Nagisa in the light, the young man laughing at things just like how Yuuji remembered. In a flash, Yuuji felt suddenly so old and yet so very, very young.

At the end of it all, their words petered out into silence. "It feels like a dream," Yuuji spoke.

Nagisa looked at him with an expression both happy and sad. "No," he answered. "It was real."

Yuuji stared at the other man for a moment. He was dimly aware that his own face held a look of something akin to awe. He decided to go ahead and ask a stupid question. "Is it really you?" he breathed.

Nagisa gave a wry smile, combined with a tilt of the head. "You could come over and make sure if you want."

Without another word, Yuuji rose from his seat. He stepped across the room. Nagisa rose to meet him. Slowly, Yuuji reached out a hand. He touched the young man's shoulder, lightly brushing against his arm. Then, timidly, he drifted one hand across Nagisa's sky-blue hair. It was soft against his palm.

In their moment of connection, Nagisa looked up at Yuuji. He flashed him a quick smile, finally wide enough to show some teeth. At the sight of it, Yuuji's entire body flushed with warmth. God. It was one of _those_ smiles. One of those that felt made of pure sunlight and always seemed to be able to steal his heart away, melting it right inside of his chest. The kind that made him fall in love with Nagisa in the first place. He hadn't seen one in the longest time.

The sight was magic, as it always was. Contained within it was genuineness, relief, joy, and yet in Nagisa's eyes, a hint of the exact same kind of sadness that had been weighing down on Yuuji for years. In the space of a moment, everything aligned around it. The world was right again.

"You don't have to believe me," Nagisa whispered. "Or even forgive me. But believe me when I say one thing: I missed you."

His voice was a soft whisper inside the room, a rush of breath filled with a quiet, deep longing. Yuuji nodded, his throat suddenly too full to speak.

He brought one hand to Nagisa's cheek. Their faces were no more than a few centimeters apart. "May I?" Yuuji mumbled.

Nagisa nodded.

They came together for a kiss. Yuuji melted into it, both of his hands resting at the back of Nagisa's head, swaying his body and just letting his mind go blank for a moment as Nagisa did the same. Five goddamn years. But Nagisa was _here_ , with his dark outfit and supple limbs, making soft noises as his own hands rested warm on Yuuji's arms, with his quiet strength, smooth face, light blue hair tied up in pigtails. He was right here. And in the moment, Yuuji didn't care, because nothing had ever felt so real.

When the two of them were done, they broke away. They were left breathless, staring into each other's eyes. Yuuji couldn't explain it, but he had the feeling that he suddenly understood. They were the same people from back then. Adults, yes, and changed by the years, but ultimately the same. Nagisa kissed him just the same, with all the bashfulness and surprising warmth that Yuuji had come to expect. And when they parted, he still blinked those soft lashes until Yuuji could see his eyes again.

 _A smile is gender-neutral,_ Yuuji's own voice rang out from his memories. _I didn't fall in love with your clothes. It was with you, Nagisa, always with you. And when I look at you I guess…those feelings are still there somewhere?_

A strong emotion swept through Yuuji's heart. That realization had always been there to lead him through.

Yuuji tugged Nagisa into an embrace. He closed his eyes, the blue strands of Nagisa's hair tickling his nose. So many feelings were swelling up within him, along with words, as if he wanted to say them, needed to say them, things that he hadn't said in so long.

"I love you."

In his arms, Nagisa closed his eyes as well. "Oh, Yuuji," he said. "I love you too."

* * *

* * *

They stood together locked in an embrace.

"You know," said Nagisa after they had stayed there for a minute, "I have some time before the show begins." He traced a slow circle on Yuuji's chest with one finger. He smiled up at Yuuji. "Keep me company?"

Yuuji nodded before even really processing what Nagisa was asking. He felt unreal, completely caught up in the presence of the young man next to him. "Stay with me," he answered, his voice holding a bit of a breathless edge to it that even Yuuji himself was surprised by.

The two of them edged closer to the bedside, hands clasped. Words were lightly exchanged as they moved, as if intent on having more conversation. On the way, they started another kiss, Nagisa sealing his lips over Yuuji's and drawing them together until Yuuji could think of nothing else. The kiss was deeper than the ones before, and passionate as licks of flame. Yuuji found that he couldn't form thoughts, his mind overtaken with the feeling of Nagisa's lips on his and the other man's body pressed up against his own. He felt each movement, every bit of suction as they pulled away only to adjust the angle before meeting again.

Yuuji did his best to reciprocate each pull and push, feeling almost shy. Nagisa led but did not force him, the young man's lips and tongue merely following along with suggestions that Yuuji's mouth was trying to give, but felt too inexperienced to make a reality. This time, something else seemed to be there between them. Their touches became more electric. Both of them could feel it. Lost in the sensation, the two of them continued, Yuuji not quite noticing how flushed his face was becoming until they finally parted for air. A sleepy realization flashed through his head.

Nagisa curled in close to Yuuji's chest, murmuring out a string of words. Yuuji's heart fluttered. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. And what was this feeling all of a sudden? "N-Nagisa…" he squeaked.

Nagisa stared directly up at him, an unknown fire burning bright behind his eyes. When his gaze met Yuuji's, an unspoken understanding seemed to pass between them. "Take me," Nagisa breathed, so soft the words could have been mistaken for a gust of air.

Yuuji's face turned bright red at the suggestion. Too hot. Everything felt suddenly too hot. His face was burning, limbs moving heavy and slow, vision glazing over. This was all like something out of a dream. But Yuuji decided not to think too hard. He swallowed and nodded, feeling almost like he couldn't control the gesture; for once, his every fiber of being felt like it was in agreement.

Nagisa paused for just a moment. "Are you sure?" he asked, tone holding the slightest of warnings.

Yuuji nodded. "Yes," he said once Nagisa seemed to want a verbal response.

Nagisa looked at him. Slowly, the coyest of smiles crept across his face.

Before Yuuji knew it, Nagisa was kissing him again. And he was kissing Nagisa back. Forcefully. The rhythm started back up between them, each bump and nudge feeling like a brush against the peak of the world. Feeling more confident, Yuuji attempted to widen his mouth slightly. Nagisa responded in kind, deepening the kiss at Yuuji's suggestion, tongue exploring the border of Yuuji's mouth and then softly slipping inside. Yuuji shivered at the sensation, resisting the reflex to pull away. Nagisa's tongue danced over his, sliding past before drawing it forward into a tangle, filled with long, slow touches and teasing flicks. Yuuji moaned, arcing deeper into the kiss. From the way he felt Nagisa's hands slide up his shoulders, he knew that had been a good response.

As they broke for a few moments, Yuuji noticed that their breaths had grown heavy. He could see reflected on Nagisa's face some of the same desire lacing his own, their eyes lidded and minds growing foggy.

Their hands were on each other, and they moved, sliding over shoulders and brushing past arms as if wanting, needing to make up for the years past, desperate to familiarize themselves with each feature of the other person's body. Yuuji felt his hands come to Nagisa's waist, the young man quivering and feeling so, so warm beneath his touch. He held back a light groan as Nagisa's hands ran over his chest and upper arms, the fibers of his clothing sending sensation far and wide. Yuuji pulled Nagisa closer, each centimeter of the man feeling intoxicating, one hand coming to the small of Nagisa's back as Yuuji kissed him again, feeling Nagisa's knee rub up against his inner thigh. Getting to feel the Nagisa that he hadn't seen for five years nearly sent Yuuji over the moon. God, this felt so, so real.

The following moments were a blur of motion, of hot, wet kisses, of trembling lips and heavy breaths, the both of them pressed so close together that it was as if they never wanted to part. Yuuji ran on automatic, losing himself to whatever his unconscious wanted to do. The world seemed to zoom in around them until it was made up of only a half-meter circle, filled with the touch of Nagisa's hands.

Yuuji widened his eyes at a new sensation. Nagisa's lips began to wander, kissing up his chin and then down his neck, moving to places Yuuji had never known them to be. Yuuji's breath came sharp in response. He brought one hand to the back of Nagisa's head, clinging desperately, but whether to make him stop or force him to continue, Yuuji didn't know. The young man seemed to take it as the latter.

There were thoughts in Yuuji's head. Suggestions. He bit his bottom lip to control them as wave after wave of sensation passed through him. He had never felt anything like this. Dear god, everything felt so _good._ It made him want to grab Nagisa and show him just how much he appreciated him, show him what lengths the man drove him to…

The two of them continued, apparently unable to fully control what was happening to them, but both happy to continue as long as their partner was up for it.

Slowly, Yuuji began to realize that he was being pushed back towards the side of the bed. He didn't resist, merely allowing Nagisa to follow him.

The cold edge of the bedframe came up hard against the back of Yuuji's knees, forcing them to trip. Yuuji spun them around as they fell. He ended up on top, his arms pressing Nagisa into the mattress.

The young man wriggled out from under him, scooting away for a moment. But it was only to get more comfortable, as Nagisa quickly spread out, cocking his head back against the bedspread as his arms fell away, exposing his torso. He lay almost prone, chest expanding with breaths as he gazed at Yuuji with unmasked adoration, his eyes bright with desire.

Yuuji swallowed hard as he stared at Nagisa, the young man's hair spread out, his body lying against the sheets, dark outfit in stark contrast to their white surroundings. God, he looked so beautiful.

And there was no doubt in Yuuji's mind about the pronoun. In the back of his mind he felt a surge of satisfaction as his eyes wandered over Nagisa's body. It was handsome, and alluring, and Yuuji had absolutely no reason to deny those thoughts any longer. Why fantasize about a figurative girl in the club when he had the real man right in front of him?

Beneath him, actually.

Yuuji tugged at his own tie. His clothes felt too hot all of a sudden. They had been such a nuisance this whole time, actually, and a crazy thought occurred to him. Wouldn't it be better if they just took them off...

He crawled up to Nagisa and braced himself over the young man. They dissolved into kissing, grabbing deep, hot mouthfuls of skin before moving on, Yuuji copying what Nagisa had done before, kissing up the edge of the young man's neck and making him gasp and shiver, Nagisa returning the favor once Yuuji had reached the top, kissing all around his face. They moved against each other, moans slipping out not only from Yuuji this time. At least, Yuuji thought so. But he couldn't think. He couldn't speak. The only thing he could do was move, completely absorbed in the person lying with him, his mind a fog of Nagisa, Nagisa, Nagisa. And with the softest of touches, Nagisa's hands were on Yuuji too.

Gently, Nagisa moved downward, his fingers rubbing and groping for a hold as they travelled to Yuuji's waist and started to tug at the fabric there. In a flash they slipped beneath, touching and kneading at Yuuji's abdomen. When Yuuji pressed closer into him Nagisa moved higher, bunching up the material while one hand flitted out to undo the top button. Moving methodically, his hands managed to coax the rest of the shirt up and over Yuuji's head.

Yuuji pulled away for a second in order to comply, tugging his shirt off with an embarrassed, self-conscious flare. He tossed the article of clothing to the side, bare chest feeling slightly chilled now in the air of the room. But when Nagisa looked at him with approval, eyes falling half-lidded, Yuuji didn't feel so caught up in himself anymore.

Immediately, Yuuji moved over Nagisa again. His hand snuck up underneath Nagisa's shirt, the young man making some sort of surprised yelp. Yuuji shot him a look. Nagisa's teeth worried his bottom lip for a second before he relaxed, bringing his own hands down to help Yuuji do the same to him. Nagisa wiggled, scooting his hips to one side as he finally tugged his shirt off over his head.

"Oh god..." Yuuji murmured at his first sight of the man's body. He hovered stock-still, unable to tear his eyes away and yet feeling for some reason like it was too much for him to witness. He braced himself on his upper arms, blushing furiously but at least trying to take in the sight that had been presented to him. Nagisa blushed as well, turning his face away but sneaking glances back at Yuuji too.

It was all hands after that, fingers sliding over each other and brushing past in search of any points that might be sensitive. Nagisa let out a soft noise as Yuuji brushed a nipple, which Yuuji immediately came back to, stimulating the area lightly until the other man shifted on top of the sheets, lips open in a silent gasp. It was all mouths, too, Yuuji planting loving kisses on Nagisa's shoulders after Nagisa finished giving hickies around his collarbone.

They were partners in this, came the sensation in Yuuji's mind. He didn't know what the other man was thinking but he could sense that it must be the same because suddenly they were _one_ , Nagisa guiding Yuuji into a deep kiss here and there, both of them moving together, arms coming up to pull each other yet closer, Yuuji slowly discovering just where to touch and Nagisa having enough knowledge to keep them both moving.

Nagisa's grip shifted around Yuuji, moving behind him to let one finger hook into the band of his underwear. The sensation of it shocked Yuuji back into his mind for a second. He broke away, panting. "Are you sure?" he asked, voice low and heavy with want.

Nagisa looked up at him, gaze smoldering. He softly whispered, "Yes."

Yuuji decided to just go for it. He took everything off, sliding his pants and underclothes off in the same motion. Immediately, he started working on doing the same to the other man. Nagisa helped, Yuuji never going faster than the man's own hands, eventually sliding his own clothes off in a manner that looked almost shy.

Yuuji pulled the top blanket over them, partly as a defense against the cold air, partly because it just seemed like the right thing to do. This time they didn't spend too much time admiring each other, Yuuji already caught up in the need to put his hands everywhere, to kiss every inch of exposed skin that hadn't been there before.

He slid his hands down Nagisa's sides, causing the young man to shiver and let out a cry. As he came back up Nagisa wrapped his arms around him, tracing up and down Yuuji's shoulderblades and making him hyperaware of every sensation. Now that there was nothing left between them Nagisa returned to kissing, peppering the corner of Yuuji's neck with slow, passionate kisses, stopping to suck at a few points. Yuuji let out a moan and found himself tilting his head in order to give Nagisa better access.

Yuuji's breath came in gasps. Desire pounded though every bit of him, arousal surging, but that wasn't all. He was almost painfully hard. Yuuji looked down at Nagisa, holding the other man's eyes (those perfect, perfect blue eyes) in an intense stare.

"I want you," Yuuji breathed, his cheeks bright red.

Nagisa nodded desperately. The man's every fiber of being seemed to scream the two words he had told Yuuji before. "I want you too," he murmured.

Yuuji shifted above him, a moment's clarity granting Yuuji the space of thought to realize just what in hell they were actually talking about. "Really?"

In a blur, Nagisa lunged forward. He smeared a kiss close to Yuuji's mouth. "Never been so sure in my life."

"Nagisa..." Yuuji breathed, every thought, emotion, and feeling currently pounding through him managing to pour itself into that one word.

He latched onto Nagisa's lips, giving him another deep kiss. At the same time, in a fit of bravery, Yuuji moved forward, bringing their hips together. He could feel the other man's arousal. Nagisa could feel his. On Yuuji's lips, Nagisa made a small noise, notching his hips back slightly.

All of Yuuji's thoughts shut down, letting him act entirely on instinct. His hands ran over legs, thighs, ribs, Nagisa goading him on and taking him higher with every touch, push, and pull, but more than that, his _sounds_ : the gasps, sighs, and desperate, cut-off moans.

Yuuji reached around to feel Nagisa's ass. The flesh felt supple and yet surprisingly, pleasantly firm in his grip. Nagisa whined beneath him, letting loose another delicious sound. Judging by that, and by the fervent gaze Nagisa was throwing him, the young man was enjoying this quite a bit. In the heat of the moment, nothing could have made Yuuji happier. Nagisa's hands explored Yuuji's body in response, making Yuuji shiver.

Finally, Yuuji's fingers slipped past Nagisa's rear, moving toward a certain spot. Nagisa tensed up and Yuuji almost withdrew, before stopping at the feeling of Nagisa's hand coming to his.

They locked eyes. Inside of Nagisa's gaze Yuuji saw a deep, burning desire, but also something else: Trust. Words felt unnecessary now.

Yuuji nodded. He delicately brought up two fingers and placed them inside his own mouth, sucking on them. Lube might work better, Yuuji realized. In fact, he was certain that that was best. But they would have to make do for now. Meanwhile, Nagisa watched him carefully, as if having the sense that this was something he'd better learn.

The sight of it gave Yuuji a much better idea. He stopped sucking on his fingers and drew them out, sneaking them up to Nagisa's mouth instead. When Nagisa parted his lips in surprise, Yuuji swiftly stuck his fingers in between. The man took them in with a light moan. He slowly sucked, getting used to the taste. Once he built up a sort of resistance, the process went much easier. Nagisa serviced two of Yuuji's fingers, then three, running his tongue both across and between them, getting each and every millimeter, making sure to coat them well. For a few minutes he did nothing but suck obediently, making doe-eyes up at Yuuji.

Yuuji's heart nearly stopped at the sight. He felt a spike of arousal so sharp that it stabbed through him like a knife.

He brought his fingers out, Nagisa's tongue still pursuing them. A thin trail of spit ran from the digits to his mouth. Yuuji flexed his fingers experimentally. They were coated well, but he would have to move fast before it dried.

Making eye contact, Yuuji moved his hand down low. One arm came to the inside of Nagisa's thigh, moving him into a good position, while the other came to rest just outside the other man's entrance.

Nagisa groaned, shivering in anticipation. Yuuji took a moment to admire the sight, a small part of him pausing to wonder and think oh my god how did he get this far. Gently, Yuuji brought the lubricated fingers to Nagisa's entrance, coating the outside and then dipping down slightly past the edge.

Nagisa responded positively, curling his toes and…was that _mewling?_

Yuuji didn't think about that. He couldn't think. No time to think. Instead, he slipped one finger inside. The sensation was warm and thick, Yuuji feeling the young man tense around him in reaction to the intrusion. He paused to let him adjust, Nagisa shifting and biting his lip. A moan escaped him when Yuuji slowly started to pump the solitary finger in and out.

After a few moments, Yuuji slipped the second finger in. Nagisa's reaction had more force to it this time. And when Yuuji lifted his head up to look into Nagisa's face, Nagisa gazed back at him with eyes glazed over with lust. Yuuji hummed to encourage him and adjusted his position, slowly getting used to the environment. He spread out the two fingers, scissoring the man from within. Nagisa shifted and gasped in pleasure, but didn't tell Yuuji to stop.

Head wrapped in a haze-like fog, Yuuji added another finger. This time Nagisa cried out at the strangeness of it, his walls clamping around Yuuji. With all three fingers lined up together, they were stretching him close to his limit.

"Hush, shh, you're doing well, Nagisa," Yuuji crooned. "Relax, just relax."

Nagisa did, slowly. With a groan and lot of shaky breaths, the muscles around Yuuji's hand slowly released their hold until Yuuji felt that he could start moving them again. And he did, moving carefully this time. Nagisa's hands gripped the bedsheets, struggling to relax himself even further, Yuuji's fingers sliding in and out and bringing further pleasure to him as a reward every time he did. Once Yuuji was comfortable enough inside Nagisa he began to feel around, sometimes reaching with only two fingers, sometimes wiggling all three, stretching both vertically and horizontally until the young man was properly widened, his hole slick with what Yuuji had brought and the man's own secretions.

Nagisa's sounds began to gain a sort of rhythm, becoming so continuous at Yuuji's touch that they sounded like song. Knowing that he brought so much pleasure to the young man was honestly the hottest turn-on for Yuuji yet. It was almost unbearable.

And so he came up for a kiss. He captured Nagisa's lips in his and pushed his tongue inside, stretching the man wider at the same time. Nagisa's moaning vibrated through their shared link. The twist of their tongues matched the pulsing of flesh around Yuuji's fingers. When he was satisfied, Yuuji slowly pulled out of Nagisa. As he broke their kiss, the other man gave a noise that almost sounded like one of loss.

In the pause that followed, Yuuji found it impossible to tear his eyes away. Nagisa fixed him with a steamy gaze, his head lolling to one side. The young man was ready. In that moment there was no assassin and associate, no wondering and no questioning, just two halves of the same whole. Yuuji swallowed roughly. His hands rested on Nagisa's waist. As he waited, Nagisa's arms came up, wrapping around Yuuji to loosely pull him closer.

Yuuji rested half an arm's length above Nagisa, their chests pressed together, bodies flush. He stared into the man's eyes. "May I?" Yuuji asked a final time.

Nagisa gave him a wordless, dizzy-with-pleasure nod.

Yuuji bit his bottom lip. He couldn't think about what he was doing; this was crazy, he didn't even know how on earth he knew how to do this. Something deep within him seemed to have this down by instinct. Once he trusted in it, he could feel himself being swept away. But that was what he needed. Without another word, Yuuji adjusted himself, moving into position.

His body was so, so hot now and all he could smell was Nagisa's skin and all he could hear was Nagisa's breathing and all he could feel was the heat of them pressed together and he couldn't think, only feel, only move, but now moving was all he wanted to do.

Nagisa groaned in confirmation. Yuuji was suddenly overcome by emotion—this was the man Yuuji wanted, the man he had known for so many years, had loved even since back then. This was him. Yuuji ran his hands slowly up Nagisa's sides once more, causing the man's back to arc in pleasure again before lacing the fingers of his left hand with Nagisa's right.

"Nagisa," Yuuji breathed out, each syllable heavy with lust, but also something else. When he looked down, the fog cleared just enough for him to look upon Nagisa with unbridled tenderness. "I love you..."

Nagisa struggled, swallowed. His free hand clutched at Yuuji's back. He tucked his head in close to whisper into Yuuji's ear. "I love you too," his words ghosted against Yuuji's skin.

Yuuji sealed their mouths with a kiss. He swung into position, aligning just outside Nagisa's entrance before pressing forward with a shove.

"Mmmh!"

"Nnh!"

They moaned into each other after the sudden breach. Almost immediately, they broke the kiss in order to fuel their gasps. Nagisa's hand clenched almost painfully around Yuuji's own. From that, Yuuji could get a sense for what the man was feeling. And if it was anything like what Yuuji was feeling right now, then it must be _fucking amazing_.

Yuuji's eyes screwed shut with sensation. Oh god, he was _inside_ of Nagisa. He could feel every twitch of the man's muscles, every shift and squeeze as Nagisa whined in reaction to the feeling of Yuuji being inside him, all of it enveloped in a searing heat.

"Nagisa," Yuuji moaned, voice hoarse. He pulled back and thrust forward once. Then twice. The man had been lubed, but only just enough. "You're so hot...and tight."

Nagisa glanced away at Yuuji's words, embarrassed. Yuuji decided he had never seen anything more arousing.

"A-And you're…so… Nngh!" Nagisa tried to reply, only to flinch when Yuuji rammed a bit too rough. "Amazing," he sighed out.

Encouraged by this, Yuuji shoved himself into Nagisa. He moved slowly at first, both of them unused to the sensation, before gradually building up some kind of a rhythm. But judging by the man's face and the uncomfortable grip on Yuuji's hand, he could tell that Nagisa wasn't enjoying it as much.

"Shh, shh, relax," Yuuji muttered. With one hand, he freely stroked Nagisa's hair. "It'll be alright, god you're so good Nagisa, so good, just relax…"

Nagisa bit his bottom lip, as if trying to hold back a scream. But he closed his eyes and concentrated nevertheless. Eventually, the muscles around Yuuji's dick loosened slightly, Yuuji sliding in and out just a bit easier. A guttural moan escaped Nagisa at the feeling. Yuuji nodded and kissed the side of his temple, encouraging the man to continue.

Yuuji took a second to adjust, lightly trying out a different angle to check that it didn't hurt as much. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Nagisa.

Nagisa whined as Yuuji moved, shoving in and out, in and out. Gradually his noises began to grow tighter, higher-pitched, until he was now almost squeaking with pleasure. He moaned with each thrust, prompting Yuuji to move just a bit faster, perhaps hit just a bit deeper.

"Mmmnh," Nagisa said as Yuuji continued. He moved his head, thrashing against the bedsheets and hands fisting in the covers. Blinking, he looked up at Yuuji with an expression of pure, wanton lust.

Now Yuuji really couldn't think. He shoved in deep, at the same time moving over to bite Nagisa's shoulder.

Nagisa yelped, his fingers coming up to grasp at Yuuji's back. "Ahn...Yuuji, please..."

A jolt of pleasure shot through Yuuji at the sound of Nagisa saying his name. He wanted to hear it again.

He moved faster, thrusting into Nagisa as the man cried out. This time his cries were ones definitely of pleasure over pain. They continued for a while, lost in time and lost to anything but each other. Nagisa's eyes rolled back in his head as he bounced on Yuuji's cock. Yuuji couldn't help but utter moans of his own, Nagisa's walls taking him in again and again. For one second Yuuji pulled back, moving almost all the way out before thrusting all the way into Nagisa even deeper than before.

And the man _whimpered._

"God…" Yuuji mumbled, trembling in response. "Oh God, Nagisa… Nagisa…"

They moved together, a mess of bliss, the occasional press of lips or stroke of arms the only interruptions to their routine.

"O-ohhhhh," a filthy noise fell from Nagisa's lips. He gave a deep sigh as Yuuji shoved into him. "Yes…more…"

"Mmm," Yuuji replied, trying to give him what he wanted.

Yuuji's eyes were screwed shut. God, this felt amazing. The other man felt incredible around his cock, everything blurring into a sequence of pink, red, hot moments. Everything was vibrations of pleasure shooting up and down his shaft, feeling comfortably warm and wet, Nagisa moaning into his ear with every thrust, Yuuji soothing him with an occasional kiss or nibble at his ear and neck. The friction built until they shared a steady, endless sensation of ecstasy.

Eventually, after everything had dissolved into a deep rhythm and the slick smell of sweat, they were only capable of saying each other's names.

"Nagisa," Yuuji sighed.

"Yuuji," Nagisa choked out a reply. "Yu…uji…"

Eventually, Yuuji seemed to hit some kind of spot. Nagisa spasmed in his grip. "Ah-ahn!" The man's nails dug into Yuuji's back, sending pricks of both pain and pleasure up his spine. But Yuuji was too far gone, and it did nothing to make him slacken his pace. Nagisa's voice took on a new tone of urgency. "Y-Yuuji! I-I think I'm-!"

"Mmm," Yuuji confirmed, still thrusting.

The pressure of Nagisa's clasped hand in his suddenly increased to an uncomfortable degree.

"Ahhh!" Nagisa cried out, his head falling backwards as his eyes squeezed shut. He bucked up from the bedsheets, wracked by a full-body shudder. His tunnel clenched around Yuuji's length, making Yuuji's eyes go wide at the increased sensation.

"Agh!" It was too much. Yuuji gasped as he came too, their hands grasping together, bones grating and adjusting, both of them supporting each other as they rode out their shared orgasm.

It shuddered through them like waves, like bursts of electricity, leaving tiny aftershocks in its wake. Yuuji curled himself around Nagisa as they both basked in pleasure. Their breathing grew louder and then slowly, slowly began to steady out. Dimly, Yuuji became aware of the slickness of Nagisa's essence coating the lower part of his stomach. He realized with a sleepy start that his own must be inside Nagisa.

Together they calmed down, the grip of their shared hands slowly relaxing. When the time was right, Yuuji slipped out of Nagisa, placing one hand on the man's hip, Nagisa letting out one more soft moan. Yes, that was definitely a sound of loss.

They blinked and their eyes met, Yuuji gratified to find the other man's gaze just as drowsy, shocked, impressed, but most of all, overwhelmed with affection. They came together for one last kiss, sloppy and wet. Neither of them had the energy left to care.

Yuuji stared down at Nagisa. The man was left panting up at him, gaze clouded, face slack, upper body covered in hickies and sweat, absolutely at Yuuji's mercy and completely fucking adorable. Yuuji flopped to the side, laying down besides Nagisa and curling up in the sheets.

They lay there in awe for a few moments, as if struggling to process what had just happened to them. Yuuji swallowed and tried to recall some words instead of the stars floating in his mind. "Are you okay?" he said at last.

Nagisa stretched in response, lifting his arms above his head. "Of course," he replied, sighing out the very last vestiges of pleasure. "I'm…better than okay."

"Not hurt, are you?"

"I don't think so." Nagisa grimaced after the stretch reached his rear. "Um. Perhaps a bit sore."

Yuuji blinked in acknowledgement.

Nagisa lay down beside him, pulling the covers over himself. His blue eyes stared at Yuuji out of the darkness for a moment. Then a light, nervous giggle escaped him. "Was I your first?" he said.

Yuuji didn't even care. "Mm-hmm," he said, shuffling forward to plant a chaste kiss on the top of Nagisa's head. "And you?"

"Yes."

Genuine surprise flitted through Yuuji's heart. "Really?" he said. "I thought…I mean, given that you're an assassin and that…you probably had to learn so many skills, I…I thought-"

Nagisa kept him captivated in a cyan stare. "No, Yuuji," he said. "I learned the basics, but never anything like this." A tiny smile lifted the corners of his mouth. "The only person I ever wanted was you."

A soft flood of emotions filled Yuuji's heart. He stared back, unable to put any of it into words. He hoped that Nagisa would somehow be able to feel it nonetheless.

But mostly, he could tell that they both didn't care to think too much right now. Yuuji felt so good in this moment, and so satisfied... Beside him, Nagisa let out a sigh. He curled up and scooted forward, snuggling against Yuuji's bare chest. Yuuji stiffened. He had never had someone do this before. It felt…nice.

He reached out and pulled the man even closer, burying his nose in Nagisa's beautiful hair so that all he could see was blue. In his arms, Nagisa closed his eyes. His breathing deepened and softened, Yuuji feeling each rise and fall of the man's chest against his own. Come to think of it, a short rest did sound like a good idea.

Yuuji closed his eyes and felt nothing but contentment in his heart as they both slipped into a quiet, sated sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For my longtime readers, I guess you can consider this a bonus for waiting through a 17-chapter fluff fic. ;)
> 
> DISCLAIMER it's not a good idea to sleep with someone the moment you're both adults; that was not my intention to endorse here! The two boys both have years of experience with each other in my mind, considering the prequel fic. Also, this scene had to happen sometime and unfortunately this was the single best place for me to put it. :p


	2. Assassination Time

When Yuuji awoke, everything was the same.

He became aware first of the sheets lying across his face. Shifting, Yuuji rolled to the side, the material sliding around him. Sleepy, he thought. Warm. Not quite bright enough to be morning, yet. Could still rest. Smelled not like home, but at least smelled clean. The sheets over him rested slightly stiffer than what he was used to, but that was alright. Still cozy.

Slowly surfacing back to consciousness, Yuuji stretched out a bit and sighed. A few remnants of the good feelings from before lingered on him. Content, Yuuji focused on them and let out a quiet hum. He didn't need to think too hard about what happened between him and Nagisa, the back of his mind decided. They had just followed their hearts. It didn't have to be a big deal if they didn't want it to be.

Although, wait. As the sleep cleared from Yuuji's mind, he felt chilled through with a sudden self-awareness. The atmosphere in the room seemed different now. Without the heavy fog pulsing through his limbs, Yuuji found that he could think more clearly, feel more sharply, and remember more… Oh dear god, what did he just do? A prickling sensation clenched through Yuuji's heart. What if Nagisa thought he was stupid? What if he had actually had second thoughts and Yuuji just hadn't noticed?

Yuuji opened his eyes. Nagisa wasn't there. Only an empty, warm spot curled in the sheets where he had lain.

Yuuji's heart skipped a beat. He jolted up.

"Ah. You're awake," came Nagisa's voice. The young man was standing a few paces away, off to the side, paused in whatever it was he had been doing. He had already gotten dressed. For some reason, he was wearing an elegant evening gown. His outfit looked well put-together, with his blue hair thoroughly brushed and styled up, a choker necklace looping around his throat, and a few bracelets fastened around his left wrist, the largest of which, Yuuji noticed, looked like it could be hiding some sharp edges beneath its clasp.

Yuuji blinked at Nagisa's outfit in confusion. He wasn't dreaming this, was he? The cold air in the room brushing across his skin made Yuuji shiver, and he clutched the blankets up to his chest, feeling suddenly self-conscious about being fully bare.

Nagisa smiled knowingly. "Your clothes are over there," he said, pointing to the edge of the bed. There Yuuji's clothes lay in a pile, folded almost lovingly. _All_ of his clothes.

Yuuji blushed. He moved to grab them. The next minute was a struggle, Yuuji flailing in his attempts to put the clothes on in a hurry, eventually being forced to take it slow, casting glances over at Nagisa as if worried that he would be staring. Briefly, Yuuji thought to himself how silly it was, given that they already knew so much more about each other now.

"Sorry for this all of a sudden," Nagisa apologized. "But the time window is approaching. And I need to get ready." He sat at one of the tables, chair almost disappearing beneath the blue shroud of his dress as he messed with an oblong container, a brush or thin wand zipping out occasionally to sweep across his face.

Yuuji nodded in reply, still staring. Was that…makeup?

"Oh," Yuuji said at last, his voice breaking the silence. He scratched the back of his head. Standing in place, he glanced around the room. Despite Nagisa's obviously thorough prep session, it was amazing how much had been left undisturbed. The young man had evidently gotten very good at this by now.

Yuuji looked back toward Nagisa. Yuuji couldn't help it; he could feel the tension in the air, settling like lightning across his skin. Suddenly he wanted more than anything to do something, to prove to Nagisa that he was more than just a hold-down-the-fort boyfriend, that he wasn't so…so…there was a word for it. And it wasn't one that Yuuji ever wanted to feel again.

Without knowing why, Yuuji cleared his throat. "Uh. Can I help?" he asked.

Nagisa paused. The lid of the makeup case shut with a crisp thud. Yuuji resisted the urge to wince, getting the sudden feeling that this was all pointless, he shouldn't have even asked-

"That's very brave of you to offer," Nagisa said slowly. "You know, I didn't come here anticipating for you to have a hand in this, Yuuji. I won't have you do anything if you don't want to."

Yuuji shrugged. Figuring that wasn't strong enough, he spoke again. "I want to," he said simply. "Just…yeah."

Nagisa looked deep in thought. Then, after a moment, he turned to face Yuuji. "Actually…yes," he said, a cheeky smile on his face. "There might be a way."

Nagisa winked. "After all, it would be suspicious for a lovely lady to be without a date, right?"

* * *

Yuuji nervously adjusted his suit jacket. Thank god he had decided to pack some formal clothes.

He stood at the bottom of a large, wide staircase. The interior of the Queen Mary's Hotel was grand, everything in shades of cream, porcelain, or gold. The hallway was spacious, the roof above them standing at at least three times Yuuji's height. Glimmering chandeliers hung for the guests' enjoyment. From top to bottom, elegant columns supported the stairwell. Their design reminded Yuuji of Greek or Roman architecture—something western, at the very least. The stairs themselves were made of smooth marble. The stairwell fanned out in layers, starting out short but growing ever wider until cascading to the bottom where Yuuji stood now, in a style reminiscent of a cake. Tiles coated the floor, polished to a shine.

Yuuji squared his shoulders and took a deep breath. He ordered himself to calm down. Honestly, right now, nothing was happening. All he was doing was waiting for Nagisa, as a good date should.

And so he stood, the silence being Yuuji's only companion. He stared at the light splayed over the tiled floor. Try as Yuuji might, he couldn't stop his mind from wandering. It replayed the last few hours, going back over each event and reviewing their contents, as if checking to make sure that this was all really happening to him. Yes, came the diagnosis, it was true. It had happened. He was here.

Suddenly, a horrible thought struck Yuuji. He straightened up as a chill punched through his stomach. Nagisa was here as an assassin, right? And he must be used to using every sort of method he could in order to complete his mission. What if Nagisa had just slept with him in order to 'test his loyalty', or to ensure that Yuuji would follow along with Nagisa in this endeavor? A long-lost reunion would have been an excellent way to exploit his affections.

Almost as soon as the idea occurred to him, though, Yuuji felt some part of him sink into a deep calm. Call him naïve, but he hadn't felt that there was anything suspicious. He hadn't seen any manipulation in Nagisa's eyes. And that action hadn't…felt like an empty ploy to earn his favor. When looking at Nagisa… Well, Yuuji couldn't explain it, but he had sensed nothing but genuineness.

Yuuji trembled for a moment and pressed one hand against his leg to stop the shaking. But then again, he guessed that he couldn't be sure.

"Excuse me."

Yuuji turned at the sound of Nagisa's voice. All of Yuuji's thoughts flew out of his head as he watched the man perched at the edge of the staircase, his soft hair tied up and his blue eyes blinking down at Yuuji, one arm paused at his chest in a gesture that was feminine enough to match Nagisa's disguise.

Nagisa descended the stairs like a princess out of a fairytale. He had taken a few minutes longer to arrive than Yuuji, just as he said he would—but it couldn't have been because of his shoes, Yuuji guessed. They were not high-heeled, but low-heeled and practical. Yuuji recalled being a bit surprised at that choice, given that most young women showed up to ballrooms in much fancier footwear, but considering Nagisa's job, Yuuji guessed that Nagisa had to use them. No matter; his floor-length skirt would hide it all anyway.

"Shall we?" Nagisa took Yuuji's arm after reaching the bottom of the staircase. Yuuji nodded, half in response half in surprise, fidgeting as he worked to consciously adjust his position to how one would support a woman. Nagisa curled himself around Yuuji's extended elbow, and together the two of them set off.

"So, I have to act like you're a girl?" Yuuji muttered during the silence.

Nagisa gave the tiniest of head-bobs as a nod. "Shouldn't be too hard," he whispered back with a wry tone to his voice.

Yuuji fought to keep his face from flushing. Even though he knew Nagisa didn't mean it that way, he couldn't help feeling a flash of something akin to guilt. He leaned in close to Nagisa and whispered, "You're more manly than you think."

Nagisa merely accepted this with a quiet nod.

Around them, a few other couples came and went. They all seemed to be heading the same way. Yuuji kept their steps unhurried, Nagisa hanging on to his every move.

Yuuji snuck a glance at Nagisa out of the corner of his eye. His disguise was impeccable. If Yuuji didn't know better, he would most definitely mistake the man's soft face for feminine on the first look. The makeup helped, of course—Nagisa had gone with a very light routine, although still accurate to what the average woman wore to these events, and the contouring also probably helped a lot with lighting the right angles on his face. His gown was almost sleeveless, save for a thin layer of mesh netting that covered the top of his chest and shoulders. That was probably meant to deter suspicion as well, Yuuji realized, blocking the view of anyone who was looking for a male assassin in disguise. Besides, even if they were… Yuuji didn't know how Nagisa could make it look like he had a bust, whatever inflatables or skin-colored tape might be involved, but now that he saw Nagisa from the side it sure looked like Nagisa had…something. Yuuji fought to suppress another light blush.

Nagisa's dress was gorgeous, colored a dark blue and long enough to brush against the floor, a trail of sparkles adding decoration and curving around his form like stars. The fabric hitched in tight around his narrow waist. His blue hair looked good in this style, hanging a bit longer down around his neck.

When Yuuji looked at the person next to him, he could still see Nagisa. But he had to admit, it was a good disguise.

Something about the sight suddenly reminded Yuuji of why they were here. Thoughts flashed through his mind in quick succession. If it weren't for the literal assassin hanging off of his shoulder, Yuuji would have tensed up. The real weight of what they were doing finally hit him. And the spark of human life seemed to burn painfully bright. Oh, god, what was he doing? An assassination…. This, this was murder, wasn't it?

Yuuji's eyes flicked to the man next to him. Could Nagisa do something like that? For some reason, the image of the 'girl' Yuuji had met on the summer island floated to the front of his mind, and how he had once told somebody that that girl on the island wasn't that sort of person, wouldn't smile during a lie like that. Stupid question, Yuuji chided himself. Of course Nagisa could. But _would_ he?

"Hey," he whispered, ducking his head closer to Nagisa. "Your...your mission. The guy. Are you going to kill him?"

Nagisa kept his expression straight, eyes staring ahead as if he hadn't even heard the question. "It's a little dangerous to talk about that here," he murmured out of the corner of his mouth. Then, after checking to make sure no other couples were near them, Nagisa gave a small sigh. "No," came the reply. "He's not going to die. My assignment is just to threaten him. Incapacitate, if necessary. He needs to turn down a certain position in the near future. The only thing I'll be assassinating today are his political chances."

Yuuji did his best to hide the feeling of relief that flooded his chest. "Oh," he said, nodding nonchalantly. "That's good." Curiosity brought one more question to his tongue. "Would I know this guy? What's his name?"

This time Nagisa did look up. "I can't tell you."

"Ah." Yuuji tore his gaze away.

"It's a risk." Nagisa gave a cheeky smile. "Besides, that'd be no fun."

Yuuji didn't know if he found Nagisa's lighthearted tone adorable or if it made his blood run cold. Maybe both at the same time.

And for the first time in a long, long while, Yuuji wasn't quite sure how he felt.

* * *

The dance room was just as breathtakingly beautiful as the rest of the hotel.

The space stretched out in an oval, the main area cleared for dancing and filled with twirling couples. At the far end stood a low platform, upon which a band was playing classical music. The platform was separated from the main floor just enough for the band to be able to play without interruption, but not enough for there to be any real feeling of separation. The music served as live accompaniment, the walls and ceiling both containing and amplifying the pleasingly authentic sounds. To the side closest Yuuji and Nagisa were rows of tables, covered in pearly white tablecloths and offering trays of delicate-looking food. The ballroom space was double-tiered, with a balcony floor attached above where dancers could sit and rest their feet while gazing down upon the open dancefloor.

Before Yuuji knew it, he became aware of a tug on his arm. "C'mon," Nagisa goaded him forward, flashing a smile. "Let's have a dance."

"Wha- Really?" Yuuji protested. His wide eyes did nothing to slow Nagisa, the man in disguise tugging and beckoning Yuuji onward. With an inner shrug, Yuuji relented, allowing himself to be guided onto the dance floor.

Immediately they were swept up in the ballroom's rhythm. Yuuji stepped lightly, moving to avoid the circling form of yet another couple and ending up right in front of Nagisa. The young man smiled up at him. Yuuji took a breath, offering his hands with both palms facing up. Nagisa melted into them, placing one hand in Yuuji's own while Yuuji's second hand came to his waist. With one more meeting of eyes, they began.

It took only a few minutes for them to get comfortable, and after that the movements came easier and easier. They swayed, moving back and forth together. One step left. One step right. Following the rotation of the crowd, they were slowly swept along in an arc around the room, all the while doing their own rotation around each other. Feeling more confident, Yuuji held up one arm. Nagisa twirled under it. When he came back, it was with a grin. The music carried them from place to place like the tide. Their surroundings blurred and shrank as they focused only on each other. The polished wood was smooth beneath Yuuji's feet, and his heels swiveled on it nicely, Nagisa gliding alongside. Every movement felt swift and precise, the entire world suddenly made up of nothing but the space between them.

Although it wouldn't look like it to any outsiders, Nagisa led them through the steps. Yuuji didn't have much education on classical dancing. He tried to at least remember what his celebrity-child lifestyle had taught him, concentrating on keeping up with Nagisa and swaying through enough steps to make it still look like he was 'the man', leading his lady around.

The dancing continued as a gentle waltz. Yuuji guided them well enough to avoid the other dancers, Nagisa taking care to keep the both of them in time. In a slight moment of fondness, Yuuji dipped his head in close, almost bringing their foreheads together. Why not? No one here knew. Nagisa seemed a bit surprised by his boldness, but after a moment, he complied.

Yuuji's eyes stayed trained on Nagisa, unable to look away. He watched the light reflecting off of Nagisa's face, the glimmer of the chandelier catching on his dress, the blueness of his hair perfectly matching his eyes. For the briefest of moments, Yuuji wondered how he must look to him. Judging by the fact that Nagisa was still staring at Yuuji, too, he must have found something to look at, at least.

Following a hunch, Yuuji pulled them into another gentle spin, Nagisa letting out a little laugh in response, happiness lighting up his expression. Yuuji's heart ached at the sight. God, he was magnificent.

In surprise, Yuuji blinked. Those thoughts caught him slightly off-guard. He hadn't entertained them in years—there had been no point, with Nagisa being so far away. To have him this close, to have him here now, was such a gift that for a moment Yuuji felt as if he would never be able to repay it.

He closed his eyes for a moment. All he could do was enjoy it to the fullest now.

As they moved, another realization came to Yuuji. The dancing crowd and the swaying of the dress around Nagisa's hips for some reason reminded him of something way back, of their very first meeting: a dance floor, shining lights, the two of them anonymous within the crowd, and Nagisa disguised as a girl. Huh.

Well. At least this time Yuuji had actually managed to give him a proper dance.

When the two of them were done, they made their way over to the side. Nagisa snagged a snack or two from the nearby trays. Yuuji did too. He also took a champagne glass from a nearby waiter carrying them on a tray. Hey, why not? Yuuji was feeling good. All the while Nagisa would give an easy laugh, hanging off of Yuuji's arm. He would smile and point out other places for them to go, as coy and coquettish as could be. Occasionally he would look up at Yuuji with a girlish adoration, of which Yuuji found himself wondering how much was meant to be sincere.

They had a second dance, for no other reason than they felt like it, swirling among the many couples and listening to the pull of the beat.

Eventually they stood on the upper level, having climbed the short staircase to check out the balcony. Nagisa leaned on the railing, both of them overlooking the top level to gaze down at the dance floor. But Yuuji found his gaze wandering back to Nagisa, finding it more fun to watch him rather than the spectacle below.

Now that they had paused, Yuuji finally had a moment to think. Within the depths of his mind, he realized how shockingly accomplished Nagisa's skills were. Nagisa's act was so good that even Yuuji had momentarily forgotten why they had come here. And anyone looking at them wouldn't suspect a thing. They appeared for all the world like a young man and his beautiful date.

But it couldn't last. Here in this small moment of pause, Yuuji had the sense that something else was in the air.

"Alright," Nagisa whispered. Though his expression remained unchanged, his voice was the most serious Yuuji had heard it all night. "I think we've built up enough cover. You ready?"

Yuuji nodded. He felt a flash of gratification when a glint of surprise in the other man's eyes implied that Nagisa hadn't really expected Yuuji to have come to his senses yet.

Together they wandered back down, Nagisa's arms wrapped around Yuuji's elbow once again. "Let's go over there," Nagisa suggested, extending one finger to point towards the far right corner of the room, near the band.

Yuuji shrugged assent, guiding them casually around the dance floor and onwards to the tables there.

He felt Nagisa tense around his arm as they passed by the far wall. "I was checking this place out earlier," the young man whispered, "when we made our rounds around the room. I have a plan, but let's see…"

Yuuji felt a twinge of surprise before the man's voice hushed. Making rounds around the room? He hadn't realized that was what they had been doing when they were dancing. Although, now that Yuuji thought about it, in retrospect it was obvious. And genius.

They walked along the far wall. Out of the corner of his eye, Yuuji watched as the tan expanse fell away, giving way to an open space held up by columns. It was too deep in for Yuuji to properly see, but Nagisa shifted beside him as if the man had found his answer.

"Damn," Nagisa hissed, curling his face into Yuuji's shoulder in a way that mimicked affection. "I wanted to get up through there. There's a staircase not too far beyond… But two guards are posted." The young man frowned. "I can't take them out without causing a disturbance, and doing anything rash would risk having my disguise be revealed… Hmm. There's no helping it, I'll have to find another way-"

"I'll do it," Yuuji interrupted.

Nagisa glanced at him with a look of pure confusion.

"You just need to get past the guards, right?" Yuuji said, ignoring the jumping in his stomach at just what the hell he was about to do. "I have an idea…"

* * *

Yuuji shuffled down the hall.

The room was wide around him, a large, flat expanse of tile bordered on all sides by those same columns. Lights from above shone onto the floor, running over the tiles in streaks. Up ahead, Yuuji saw the two guards Nagisa had been talking about. The men were tall and broad, one larger than the other, the left one with a standard haircut and the right looking like he was of foreign ancestry. They wore formal black suits with their eyes hidden behind sunglasses. On their faces were stoic frowns. If Yuuji squinted, he could just barely see an earpiece in both of their right ears, accompanied by a wire. The two guards had definitely noticed Yuuji, but it didn't look like they were making any moves yet.

Yuuji swaggered up to them, craning his neck as if trying to peer into the space beyond. "Heyyy," he drawled, as if just seeing this place for the first time. "Is this place open? Looks kinda nice. Is there s'm other dancefloor just beyond here or somethin'?"

The two guards just stared at him. One of them curled his lip.

"Hunh? Hello, I'm talking to you," Yuuji said, mirroring the guard's expression of disdain. He leaned in close, as if trying to get a better look at their faces. "Sheesh, what do they even pay you guys for? I'm just tryin'a ask if there's another place beyond here I could go."

"Further areas are off-limits," one of the guards snapped.

"Aww, c'mon," Yuuji whined. He swayed on his feet a little, summoning a smile to his face. "I'm just tryin' to have a little fun. You always so rude to paying guests? This hotel's pr'tty cool, and I'll bet the rest of it is too, so why not just let me have a little look-see, alright?"

Yuuji prattled on for a few more sentences, focusing on his act. In the face of the guards' unmoving expressions he let go of all thoughts, just talking and letting the words fall out of his mouth. Despite the jittering nervousness, Yuuji found that the excuses actually came rather easy once he had a hold of them. If there was anything he knew how to do, it was how to be sleazy.

Speaking of sleazy…

"Look," Yuuji said at last. "I'm here with a date. And I'm tryn'a find some nice place where she and I can be alone, 'f you know what I mean." He winked and jostled the guards, pretending not to notice when they scowled and shook him off. "From one guy to 'nother, I betcha both understand."

"I'm sure your hotel room would do just fine, sir."

Yuuji frowned. "Aww, you guys are no fun. Can't you do me a solid? Just this once?"

"No."

"Oh, please. Look, I'm not like the rest o' those morons out there, y'hear? I'm different from them, I'm special! I just… yo, you really got no reason to be disrezpectin' me like this."

"We have plenty, sir."

"Come on. Y'have no idea who I am, d'you?"

"Frankly, we don't care."

Yuuji let out a dry laugh. "Oh. Gonna play _that_ game are we? I see. You guys are funny."

Yuuji kept up the charade, focusing on the barest trace of alcohol in his blood. He wasn't drunk—far from it, and could hold his alcohol very well, actually, due to lots of practice when young—but he at least knew how to act like it. All the while, he added in a few gestures that Nagisa had told him to use, gathering the guards' attention toward himself, and stood close in order to obstruct their vision.

Meanwhile, over the dark outline of the guards' shoulders, a smear of blue slowly drifted into Yuuji's line of sight. It was Nagisa, blue hair and dress in stark contrast to the room as he snuck in behind the guards. Yuuji tried not to let his eyes wander to his form.

Still, due to whatever reason, Yuuji could sense the guards getting tired of him. And if they got tired of him, their attention would start to wander. Crap. Yuuji dug deep. What could he do…

In one swift motion, Yuuji reached into a pocket and pulled out his wallet. "Look. I know what this is all about. What say I give each of you a few thousand, and we'll call it a dea-"

Before Yuuji could blink, the taller guard in front of him scowled, pulled back, and punched him right in the face.

Yuuji reeled. Pain exploded across his left cheek, agony bruising through while the force of impact turned into tingling spots along the edges. They punched him! They had actually punched him! The indignant, surprised, spoiled-rich-kid expression on his face was genuine, at least.

The guards scoffed. "We don't want your stinkin' bribery," spat the one who had punched Yuuji. "Damn fat-cats…"

The anger on their faces told Yuuji to scram. And he did. Yuuji ran, stumbling, from the room, unable to summon any courageous words to his tongue.

Back inside the ballroom, Yuuji nursed his cheek. The waiters all seemed to be giving him a wide berth, but that was fine. Dully, Yuuji thought to himself that the guards probably shouldn't be hitting guests, but if what they were protecting was really so important…he supposed that would explain it. Still. Yeesh. Yuuji blinked away the pain. That _stung_.

Well, at least he had managed to do _something_ , Yuuji thought, hoping that Nagisa had gotten through okay. He found himself unable to resist tossing one last look over his shoulder. In all the confusion, he had lost track of the young man. Eh. Yuuji shrugged. He was probably fine. From now on, Yuuji couldn't do anything to help him further.

Privately, he squished down another thought: _should_ he have even helped him?

Yuuji glanced around. Throughout the room couples were dancing, waiters bore food, a band played, and a chandelier shone bright overhead. But Yuuji had no desire to stay. Something about it felt empty now.

He turned towards the Grand Staircase and left.


	3. Secret Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for sensual content in the latter half of this chapter! Nothing explicit, but just…teasing. You'll find it after the "line break" as a marker.

The lights were bright inside of his hotel room.

Yuuji waited. At last the room felt like it was a place lived-in, with the lamps turned up to a sensible degree, the chairs moved and arranged slightly away from the tableside, bedsheets rumpled where a certain somebody had attempted to make the bed and then promptly realized that they had never quite learned how. The doily was left crooked on the coffee-table.

Yuuji sat in the living room, his hands folded, legs occasionally swaying languidly beneath the chair seat. Some ice taken from the in-room bar had helped with his cheek. The pain of impact from that punch had now subsided to a dull throb, and Yuuji had learned that if he didn't focus on it, it was barely even noticeable. Just a blunt sensation to fill his mind and pass the time with if he so pleased.

He didn't know what he was thinking about. Yuuji didn't even realize how much he had been spacing out until a frantic knocking came at the door.

_BAM-BAM-BAM_

Yuuji leapt up at the sound. The noise was so frenzied that Yuuji couldn't stop himself from immediately rushing across the room to get the door. He paused for a moment once there, setting a hand on the knob while barely remembering to snag a quick look through the peephole. His vision was filled with a flash of blue. He turned the lock.

"Are you okay? What happened?" Yuuji asked, stepping aside to let the door swing open. Nagisa burst into the room, dashing past without a word.

"H-Hey!" Yuuji flinched backwards. A chilled air seemed to follow the man's form—nothing physical, not like a gust of wind, for Yuuji would have felt that. But a shiver, a trace of… _something_ that made a shudder run its fingers up Yuuji's spine, made the hairs rise on the back of his neck. The feeling was dark. The feeling was cold. It felt like the barest brush of scales against his skin. For the briefest of seconds, Yuuji almost hallucinated the image that he had let in a snake.

Nagisa rushed deeper into the room, his blue dress trailing in a whirlwind behind him. Without looking back, he motioned in a flick of the wrist for Yuuji to slam the door shut. Then he started stripping, whipping his dress off and stepping out of harnesses, the straps of weapon holsters, garters, becoming visible and then falling to the floor.

"Hey!" Yuuji called out again, his voice rising to a squeak. He could feel his face go red as he averted his eyes, running to the door and hurriedly swinging it shut.

Nagisa never paused for a second, shedding bracelets and snapping the choker collar from his own neck. He moved in a blur. Within the span of a blink, the dress and accessories had been shoved underneath the bed along with Yuuji's luggage, the makeup case snatched up and disappearing somewhere his vision wasn't fast enough to catch. That all taken care of, Nagisa streaked to the bathroom in a smudge of tan-and-blue and disappeared inside.

Yuuji stood stock-still. His eyes stayed wide, unblinking, unable to process what had just happened.

"Uh… Nagisa?" He addressed the open bathroom door.

In response Yuuji received nothing but the distinct feeling of hostility. It radiated dull and hot through the air, shooting towards him like some kind of dart, a nonverbal warning: _'don't speak my name'_.

Just then, Yuuji heard—or rather, felt—the impact of boots tromping down the hall.

A spike of fear shot through Yuuji. _Oh, no_ , Yuuji thought, begging gods that he wasn't even sure really existed. _Please don't stop here, please, whatever you do, don't…_

The sounds grew louder, louder, until they were right outside Yuuji's door, and then continued on down the hall. It sounded like there were five to eight men out there, and all of them dead serious. For a moment it was silent. Then the sounds of running became louder again, heading back towards Yuuji's doorstep.

Yuuji cringed and cursed inside his head at the sharp sound of knuckles hitting against wood. It sounded almost as if those fools would break the door down if he didn't answer it in time! Heart pounding in his ears, Yuuji moved a shaky hand to answer.

He moved himself up against the wood, pretending to take his time. "Who is it?" he called, face pressed close to the door.

"Hotel security," came the muffled reply. "Open up."

Yuuji did his best to swallow down a scream. Thankfully the people outside wouldn't be able to sense the sweat on his palms. "I-I beg your pardon?"

Yuuji brought his face to the peephole, peering through the lens. Standing on the other side was a pack of at least eight guards, all of them dressed in formal suits and dark sunglasses. Their expressions were serious.

As Yuuji looked, an ID card with a badge was shoved in his face. "For reasons related to this area's security we order that this door be opened. Room check."

Yuuji softly opened the door a crack, undoing the main lock but keeping the chainlock strung across the four-centimeter-wide gap. He peeked through the opening. "Are you kidding me? What's the meaning of this?"

"There's been an accident," the guard standing in front informed him. "We regret to inform you that further details are classified. However, we are searching for the perpetrator as we speak. And we have reason to believe that they might have fled this way."

"An accident? How frightening…" Yuuji said, widening his eyes with fake innocence.

The guard reached into his chest pocket and took out a small photograph, holding it to Yuuji's eye level. On it was a small image of Nagisa in his female disguise, taken from the front. "Have you seen anyone like this woman?" came a rough voice.

Yuuji peered closely, pretending to consider it. "Nope, never seen that person before in my life."

The guard frowned. "This assailant is known as the Blue Lady, and is considered armed and dangerous. We believe it necessary to take all possible precautions. That includes having the authority for room searches."

Yuuji tried to look doubtful. "You're looking for _a Blue Lady?_ " Yuuji repeated, voice volume raised slightly. Dimly, he hoped it would be enough to reach Nagisa in the bathroom. The guards would probably just interpret it as concern or disbelief.

The head guard scowled. "That's right. So in the interest of your own security, _sir,_ please open up."

Behind the doorframe, Yuuji grit his teeth. He couldn't stall any longer. He had to let the men in or it would look too suspicious.

Unable to stop his gaze from flicking to the side once, Yuuji drew back a few centimeters. "So, you want me to _let you in_ so you can _have a look around?_ " he questioned, careful to angle his mouth towards the open bathroom but not too much.

The main guard confirmed with a grim nod, his fingers curling around the edge of the doorframe.

Yuuji hesitated for one second more. Then, with a sigh, he relented. "Alright, alright," he said. "Come on in."

He turned the doorknob and was immediately pressed to the side as men in black suits flooded into the room.

Yuuji stared as they got to work. The men targeted furniture, appliances, spreading out to begin their search with cold, calculating movements almost as if they had rehearsed it. They started poking around, shoving past chairs and sorting through pillows. A few of them even stalked into the kitchen space.

On the side, Yuuji hid the bottom of his face behind one hand, pretending to bite at a thumbnail. He concentrated over the jittering sensation in his chest, doing his best to let only just enough nervousness show. Think. What would someone who had just heard of an at-large criminal for the first time, and had their room forced into, act like? He tried to erase all knowledge of the "Blue Lady" from his mind and consider it with a fresh perspective. Yuuji stared at the guards farthest from him with concern, doing his best to look clueless, confused, should any of them glance back.

Yuuji panicked silently as he watched the security agents push back curtains, rifle through closets, opening up cabinet doors and peering into their corners, digging around to leave nothing unturned, shuffling through each and every clothes drawer no matter how small. They continued through the room, occasionally knocking or pushing on a flat surface inside the closets as if checking to make sure there were no false bottoms. With a jolt, Yuuji realized that he didn't actually know where Nagisa was hiding either. Hopefully he wouldn't find out along with the guards.

His hands shook with the want to do something. But privately, Yuuji realized that he had no idea how best to help. If he did anything, or even tried to redirect their suspicions, it might backfire. Knowing him, it almost certainly would. So instead Yuuji just decided to stay still. Checking to make sure none of the security agents were watching, he closed his eyes in worry. For this, he would have to rely entirely upon Nagisa's powers of deception.

Yuuji bit back a yelp when the agents reached his luggage, one of them bending down to kick underneath the bed. "Hey!" Yuuji shouted when the man reached for the handle in order to investigate further. "Be careful with that! I'll have you know that's my personal property!"

The guard glared up at him. He didn't let go of the bag's handle.

Yuuji tried to meet his gaze with confidence. "You might be able to search this room, but I don't think you have my consent to sort through my personal items. Just try it. I guarantee the fees will be worth more than your life," Yuuji bluffed.

The guard kept his gaze. He shook the suitcase once. Objects clattered around inside, but the sound was faint. The suitcase itself didn't seem to be very heavy. Apparently satisfied, the guard put the suitcase down and shoved it roughly back underneath the bed.

Yuuji let out a sigh, relieved that they hadn't found the incriminating dress. But at the same time, he cut the breath short.

In fact, Yuuji's heartbeat was so loud he almost worried that the more sensitive of the men would be able to hear it, would sense it, would pick up on the blood pumping more quickly through his veins. They would glare at him, snarl, nostrils flaring, and demand to know where he had hidden "her". And Yuuji would have to stammer through a non-answer.

His heartrate skyrocketed as the agents reached the bathroom. Helpless, Yuuji watched as two of the men entered, the first one glancing behind the door while the other began shuffling mercilessly through the cabinet space.

Yuuji began to sense some of the other agents' gazes lingering on him. In response, Yuuji regathered himself and put on his 'slightly worried' expression. TV news anchors had many masks, after all.

After a short while, the two guards who had entered the bathroom reemerged without any indication that they had found something amiss. There had been no sudden shout or gunshot to alert Yuuji that the game was up. And after three more minutes had gone by, Yuuji could tell that the guards were getting frustrated. From what Yuuji could tell, they had already checked everything at least once.

He couldn't risk letting the guards do a second sweep through. Yuuji quietly cleared his throat. "If you boys can't find anything, then I might suggest you leave," he said, his tone promising more of a threat than he really felt up to making.

The guards scowled, but looked around the room as if lost. They didn't seem to have any new piece of evidence. One of them batted unenthusiastically through the curtains again.

With a little foot-tapping and some arched eyebrows, along with meaningful glances thrown at the head guard, Yuuji was able to prod them slowly towards the exit. The men cast a few last looks around as they went. If the situation weren't so serious, Yuuji might have laughed. Their expressions looked so frustrated. They must have really been expecting to find something.

"Now see, I told you there was nothing here," Yuuji said. His eyebrows furrowed as he played into the role of a spoiled media-tycoon heir who had just been made to endure a waste of their valuable time. Still, his voice struggled to transform all the triumph that he felt into anger. He attempted to play it off as smugness instead. "Best of luck with finding that Lady elsewhere," he sneered as the last of the agents guided themselves out the door.

"And if you ever wrongfully accuse me again, I'll sue you!" Yuuji called out, one hand cupped to his mouth. In the doorway, the final guard paused. He looked back for a moment to give what Yuuji surmised must have been a glare, before disappearing around the edge of the door and slamming it shut.

The sound of boots tromped away down the hall. And Yuuji stood alone inside the center of the room.

After ten minutes, Yuuji's ears stopped straining to hear every little sound. The miniscule trembling in his arms and legs began to quiet, the stress pinching around his heart slowly beginning to relax. Even then, he waited two minutes more, in case the guards inexplicably came back.

Then he got up and made his way over to the bathroom.

Yuuji walked inside, the doorway falling away behind him like the border to some unknown world. The room was beige and white, with mottled marble countertops slick enough to reflect the soft lighting. The appliances were all snowy white. Everything was quiet and still. Yuuji cast a glance around. He shifted uncertainly on his feet. "They're gone," he whispered into the void.

A clatter came from over by the toilet. Yuuji fought the urge to jump out of his skin as Nagisa slowly appeared, a stack of towels falling over as the man unfolded himself from behind the toilet seat. "Phew," the man breathed once he was out in the open. "Now that was exciting."

Yuuji stared openly. "Y-you were hiding behind the toilet," he said, dumbfounded.

Nagisa blinked at Yuuji. "Well, yeah. I could fit. It wasn't easy, but I was running on instinct, okay?" Nagisa turned slightly and pointed behind him. "Besides, the wastebasket and towel pile hid me from the sides."

Yuuji looked. On the side facing him was a lined wastebasket, the decorative holes in its bamboo sides covered up by the white liner within. And on the other side, where Nagisa had emerged from, was a thick stack of folded, fluffy towels.

"How did you fit back there?" Yuuji muttered. More than that, he had done this all on instinct? Yuuji was impressed.

Nagisa stretched, letting out a small groan. "Practice and lots and lots of panic," the young man sighed. Then he looked back up at Yuuji. "But hey. Thanks for covering for me."

Yuuji blinked. "Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. No problem." Then he glanced down and blushed. "Also, um…your clothes."

Nagisa looked down at himself, completely nude. "Oh. Right."

He calmly stood up, gently stretching out his legs as he rose. Nagisa walked out of the bathroom as casual as could be. But following from behind, Yuuji could see that the man was still slightly on alert, a certain stiffness latent in his limbs as if in case one of the guards was still lurking about.

Thankfully, once back in the living room the young man's suspicions seemed to fade. His assassin instincts must have concluded that they were no longer in danger. Nagisa started to put some clothes on, retrieving an outfit from his small black backpack which he had hidden inside of Yuuji's suitcase. As he opened the luggage container, Yuuji saw a flash of the incriminating dress within, as billowy and lovely as ever. Soon Nagisa was dressed in slacks and a soft blue shirt, complete with a vest. Yuuji stared at him once the young man was fully dressed. When had he put his stuff in there? Yuuji didn't know.

Nagisa sighed and turned around, running one hand through his hair. He hadn't had the time to undo the style in all his rush, and some makeup from before still dusted his face. "I'm sorry, Yuuji," he confessed. "This is exactly why I didn't want you to get involved. Things are…never certain in my profession. Hopefully you're not too shocked." Nagisa frowned. "At least that actually went rather well. Things could have gotten…messy."

Yuuji shook his head. "No, I'm the one who should be apologizing," he said, a stab of guilt suddenly bursting through his chest. "They were so close. They knew where you were, Nagisa. They almost got you because I…"

He was going to say because he had messed up, because he had gone out on a date with "her", had maybe led the guards back to their location, had let them inside the room, but just then, Yuuji's thoughts were interrupted by the soft touch of Nagisa's hand on his cheek.

"Hey," the young man said, his voice a well of calm. His other hand came up to the opposite side of Yuuji's face. A thumb wisped gently along the curve of Yuuji's left cheek. "It's okay now. You're safe, Yuuji? Are you alright?"

There was genuine concern on his face. Yuuji could see it as he gazed down, Nagisa looking back up at him, his expression filled with gentle worry, eyes speaking volumes of the events that had just occurred, words holding an honest interest in Yuuji's well-being. Yuuji almost couldn't believe it. Given the man's certainly far-more-dangerous situation earlier this evening, he couldn't imagine why Nagisa would be worried about him.

Still, he thought, nothing had ever felt so soothing as the warmth of Nagisa's hands on his cheeks.

"Yes," Yuuji confirmed. "I'm alright." He closed his eyes.

Then Yuuji looked back up, directly meeting Nagisa's gaze. "And you're safe, Nagisa?" Yuuji asked, one of his hands coming up to meet the one on his right cheek. "Are you alright?" His eyes swept over Nagisa for a second, as if searching for wounds.

Nagisa looked back at him, shocked. Then he dropped his gaze, a shy smile sneaking across his face. Yuuji could tell what he was thinking. Yuuji always managed to ask if Nagisa was okay, even if no one else did—perhaps especially then. The young man was so capable that it seemed almost silly at times to ask, but still. Yuuji couldn't help but care. He didn't understand why nobody else ever seemed to ask the most important question of all.

Nagisa nodded. "Yes. I'm fine," he confirmed.

Yuuji felt his shoulders sag with relief. Words felt suddenly unnecessary. There was no need to speak when the most important thing in all of existence was them, right here, right now, standing whole and alive in this moment.

After a few minutes of shared silence, Nagisa pulled away. He nodded. "Then, there's nothing to worry about," the young man said. "We made it through, and that's all that matters."

He walked past Yuuji, strides purposeful, likely off to do some other task or to focus on properly packing away everything and erasing all evidence of the Blue Lady.

In his absence, Yuuji let out a breath. He cast a glance around, feeling almost as if he were coming back to his senses—as if surfacing from a place deep underwater. Yuuji wondered what he should do now. What was one supposed to do, exactly, after just barely escaping a shakedown by intimidating private guards?

On a side table, the small black shape of a remote caught his eye. Yuuji reached for it with fingers that only shook a little. Maybe there was something on TV.

* * *

 For the next small while, things were almost normal inside their hotel-room hideaway. Nagisa recommended that they both lay low for the rest of the night, waiting through the hours until they could be sure that the guards had finally called off their search.

So Yuuji didn't even notice really, or care, when Nagisa started putting on the dress again.

"Hey, Yuuji."

Yuuji spared a glance behind him. He had long ago turned the television off, bored with what was available. A confused frown passed over his face as he saw Nagisa's outfit, but he decided to let it go. "Yeah?"

The young man fidgeted in his dress, his back mostly turned. "So you really do like your job?" he asked, one hand flicking towards the calendar app open on Yuuji's phone.

Yuuji glanced down at it. "Yeah," he said. "It's been pretty different from what my parents expected me to do, but it's a nice compromise. And my station's been really nice to me, too. Most people don't get to become main newsanchors without a few more years of experience, but… Eh, I guess they liked what they saw."

"That's nice," Nagisa said, his voice carrying a smile. There was a brief pause. Then, "I…really am sorry that it took so long for us to meet," Nagisa apologized.

Yuuji chuckled. "Hey, don't worry about it. We already made up, right?" He stood and walked over to the wastebasket, flicking away a crumpled scrap of notepad paper that had been used to fill in his schedule.

"Still…" Yuuji could almost picture Nagisa twirling a finger through his blue hair. The man seemed to have wandered closer behind him. "I feel awful about it. Do you ever...think that we should make up for it?"

Yuuji frowned. He turned toward Nagisa, fixing the other man with a semi-stern look. "Nagisa. Look. It's fine. I don't want you to feel like you owe me anything. Just…" Yuuji scratched the back of his head. "I'm really glad that we got to know each other again and all, but you don't have to 'make up for lost time' or anything. I mean, earlier was great but, if you don't want to do those things again, that would be okay too. You can't trade years away for…for sex, anyway." Yuuji glanced to the side, a light blush threatening to rise on his cheeks. "Besides, that's…that's not how I think of you. Um. I mean, I see you as much more than that."

He nodded quickly, before he could get any more embarrassed, and strode back towards the desk. "So yeah, how 'bout we just…do whatever we want? See what happens?"

As he passed by, Nagisa blinked. The young man looked genuinely touched for a moment. He glanced down, expression pensive behind a curtain of blue hair. Quietly, Yuuji heard him mumble, "Do whatever we want…hmm?"

Nagisa looked up. "Alright. I've decided. Have you?"

Yuuji quirked an eyebrow, pausing in his steps and turning to look back. "Um…not really. That was fast-"

"Perhaps I could offer a suggestion."

Nagisa lunged. His arms wrapped around Yuuji's arms, slender limbs curling around his torso in an embrace, lips pressing against Yuuji's own in a kiss, their bodies brought suddenly together. Yuuji's eyes flew wide with shock. The next thing he knew, his sense of balance lurched in a blur of motion as the two of them fell backwards with a thump.

The first thing Yuuji did was wince. Oww. Then he opened his eyes and felt his heart skip an entire beat. The two of them were on the floor, Nagisa on top of him.

"Y'know, I was thinking…" Nagisa spoke. A sultry purr edged his voice. "I just realized we never really got to fully enjoy this outfit. Figured I might break it out again for a bit longer." His hand traced slowly down Yuuji's shoulder and neck, coming to rest at his collarbone.

Yuuji sucked in a shaky breath. He looked at Nagisa looming above him, the man's hair blue as the sky, wisping about his face like clouds, his deep sapphire eyes half-lidded, dress a cascade of midnight folds and twinkles.

"N-Nagisa…" Yuuji stuttered out. He couldn't believe this. What was happening?

Nagisa's face held a quiet, coy smile. He tilted his head and smirked.

He touched lightly, moving his hands along Yuuji's chest and arms, softly bringing one finger up to rest for a moment against Yuuji's bottom lip before lifting it away. He talked slowly, voice low. For one moment Nagisa bent in closer, arcing his back in a way that emphasized his chest-

Yuuji tore his eyes away. No! He wouldn't think about that. Nagisa wasn't a woman. But he looked so… Against his will, Yuuji's resolve faltered. A certain paralysis seemed to spread throughout his limbs. This wasn't…this was…

"I'm fascinated by you, Yuuji," Nagisa said, his voice a fond murmur. His gaze swept across Yuuji in a long, appreciative arc. "Wouldn't you say the same for me? Wouldn't you want me? Even like this?"

Yuuji's thoughts were going haywire. "I, um," he stuttered. He shifted for a moment, as if trying to back away. But all of a sudden, Yuuji's attention began to wander, eyes caught by the sheen of the fabric against Nagisa's skin, thoughts captured by the flow and flutter of the skirt piled around his legs. "Yes?" Yuuji squeaked. "But Nagisa, I-"

"Do you like me like this?" Nagisa asked. His touch ghosted across the top of Yuuji's shoulder while he spoke. "Is it something you've been thinking about?" The light sensation of his fingers danced up Yuuji's neck, flitting enough to leave aftershocks wherever they alighted. "Something you might have remembered while you were alone?" Yuuji shivered. "Something you've been…imagining?" He gazed down at Yuuji with a heavy stare.

Yuuji held Nagisa's gaze. His breathing was growing heavy again, his eyes held captivated, frozen. His mind was empty but at the same time felt filled with a new sensation. Every bit of him seemed to be on edge, hands gripping the carpet, desperate to reach up and touch Nagisa but knowing that somehow, no, he _couldn't_.

Nagisa had taken off the makeup and put his hair back up in short pigtails, but that didn't make him any less charming. In fact, now that he was more recognizable to Yuuji, he might have been even more attractive this w-

No! Yuuji reeled on the floor, struggling to avoid reconciling the feeling of Nagisa with the image of the beautiful seductress in front of him. Nagisa wasn't like that. He didn't have petite shoulders, all soft and inviting. He didn't have wider hips, the dress fitting his supple figure to a T. He didn't have the long, thick lashes, each bat of them enough to send men toppling to their knees and speed up someone's heartrate. But still, eyes sweeping over the sight before him, Yuuji couldn't quite stop his thoughts from wandering in a certain direction. This person was right in front of him. This was the Blue Lady, here, right on top of him, all for him…

"Weren't you awfully surprised when I walked down those stairs, Yuuji?" Nagisa murmured again, the tips of his fingers exploring over Yuuji's body. "Wouldn't you have just loved to be sending glances at me all night? Or were you anyway, and I just never picked up on it?

Yuuji's breath caught in his throat. "Na-gi-sa," he whined in response. Dimly, Yuuji realized that his voice had become more of plead than a protest.

Nagisa looked down at him, pleased.

Summoning the last of his rationality, Yuuji fidgeted and blushed, trying to move so that Nagisa wasn't sitting over him quite so directly. Was he…? Yes. It was a little embarrassing, but Nagisa's actions were having a certain effect on him down below. Maybe the man wouldn't notice if Yuuji just-

A smirk from Nagisa told Yuuji that the jig was up. Yuuji bit the inside of cheek to stifle a groan.

Maybe at least that would convince Nagisa to treat him a bit more indulgently? Yuuji's fogged-up thoughts were disappointed when Nagisa leaned forward only to whisper in his ear, Yuuji's limbs going stiff at the man's enticing words, his every fiber of being seeming to drink in Nagisa's presence until the young man withdrew, leaving Yuuji pining and feeling strangely empty, wishing for more.

"Nngh…" Yuuji bit his lip. He _yearned_ to touch Nagisa but stayed put, a slave to Nagisa's every move and ministration. The rules here were clear. Nagisa could touch wherever he wanted. Yuuji could only sit and bear it. On this floor, he was entirely at Nagisa's mercy.

Besides— Yuuji's fingers gripped the floor. If he reached up to take what was being offered here, then wouldn't it be like admitting that he was enamored with this female persona? That would be losing, that would be… Nagisa wouldn't… But oh god, for a moment Yuuji almost considered it.

The next few minutes felt like glorious torture. Yuuji trembled with desire at every tease and tantalization. He didn't say a word, didn't need to, the expressions on his face and the silent longing broadcasted by his body being the only communication Nagisa needed to see. Yuuji closed his eyes as something like a mix of pain and pleasure shot through him.

Each brush of Nagisa's skin against his felt like lightning, every soft breath and blink feeling as if it was blessed by the gods themselves, every whispered word sending tremors down Yuuji's spine and raising him even more up on edge. Heat surged through him. He wanted. He wanted. Dear god, Yuuji wanted. But every time his hand started to lift up from the carpet, Nagisa would gently press it back down.

Now that he had gotten some attention from Nagisa, Yuuji felt strangely hollow whenever those sensations from earlier weren't upkept. He found himself wishing that Nagisa would touch him again, that he would lean just a bit closer, just a millimeter further and bestow upon Yuuji even the tiniest scrap of sensation, the smallest sign of his favor, because now suddenly it was all Yuuji could think about and all that he was, his entire being wrapped up in staring at this gorgeous man before him, life itself not worth living if it wasn't filled to the brim with Nagisa's presence in every single sublimely excruciating moment.

The pressure built. That light kiss from before flitted through Yuuji's mind again. It tortured him now. He burned with want for it, with need, feeling it almost tingling on his own lips, shivering with the memory of it. He had to have it back—he wanted it so bad, so bad, so bad.

The sound of his breathing and heartbeat were too loud. Suddenly Yuuji couldn't concentrate on anything at all. He closed his eyes, begging silently for release, any sort of release.

The dress shifted around Yuuji and he gasped. He felt hypersensitive to each push and pull of fabric. His gaze stayed locked on Nagisa above him, Nagisa in blue and indigo and so beautiful in this dress, but a dress that Yuuji was certain he must hate to wear. Yuuji's fingers twitched. He clenched his teeth against the unbearable pressure. He felt so hot, so teased, and so confused. God, why was Nagisa doing this to him?

"N…Nagisa," Yuuji sighed out, closing his eyes and tilting his chin upwards in surrender as if to drink from a fountain that he could never quite reach. This was pure agony. This was heaven. This was hell. "I…"

Then, at the very height of his emotions, Nagisa pulled away. Yuuji heard him give a little sigh, the warmth of Nagisa's hand fading from Yuuji's chest as Nagisa rocked back to stare down at him with a contented expression. "Well, that's enough," Nagisa said, his tone satisfied but not dismissive. "I think I'm done for now."

He got up, unfolding his limbs and removing himself from Yuuji, the ruffles of his dress shifting and following along with him. Slowly, Nagisa stood up, then straightened his skirt and walked away.

Yuuji was left adrift. He stared after Nagisa for a bit, his expression slack, bereft. Nagisa had left him arms empty, desires unfulfilled, and his pants most definitely all too tight around the center. A feeling of indignation flashed through Yuuji. He didn't… He couldn't just… How dare he?

Yuuji bit his bottom lip. Now that the inciting presence had been removed, the blast of clear thought through his head was a shock, coming upon him almost like a gust of wind. Once the fog began to fade, his mind felt almost painful in its clarity.

Struggling to gather his wits, Yuuji shakily moved to sit up. He shook his head, bracing one hand against his brow. All of his thoughts were filled with the color blue, with gentle curves, with soft twinkles and the searing feeling of _want_ , of deep, all-encompassing infatuation. Of Nagisa in a dress and—Yuuji gulped—how _alluring_ he had seemed just then. Yuuji stared at his hands, conflicted. He wasn't supposed to like Nagisa as a girl, right? He loved him as a man. So, why…? One thing was for sure: Nagisa had given him an image that he would never forget.

Yuuji cast a glance in the direction Nagisa had gone. He felt so confused.

What had _that_ been all about?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huh. I just realized that this is probably the only nsfw YuujixNagisa work out there, including any fanart… well, hope you all enjoy it. :D;
> 
> Next chapter will be the final one! It will be very short, and serve as a transition to the third and final installment of this relationship… and no, I can't believe I'm doing this either! O_O


	4. Question Time

Nothing much happened after that.

The atmosphere in the area soon returned to normal, towels were cleaned up, not a single noise thudded down the hallway, and time passed on and on, but within the small space of the hotel room, events felt as if they played themselves out inside a pocket dimension. Realistically, Yuuji knew that hours were slipping by—the lights were turned dimmer and then brighter, room-service was delivered and dishes set out. But for at least a little while, the hotel room seemed to become their own little world.

They talked. They lounged. Neither Yuuji nor Nagisa felt any urgency towards any one thing, content to just relax in their victory. They dug snacks out from the kitchenette, setting drinks (nonalcoholic, of course) up on the counter. There was light conversation. Even lighter laughter. A light feeling around Yuuji's shoulders that hadn't been there in years. They never bothered to turn on the TV, favoring instead turning to each other with a grin every time there was a new memory they wanted to share, whispering to each other in the dark.

Some other things might have happened, too, in the middle of all that. The two of them had the entire space to themselves, after all. Maybe they found each other drifting closer. Maybe wondering if all that kissing from before could have perhaps been a dream, and needing suddenly to make sure it wasn't. And there was only one bed in the room when the depths of night came, all the better for an excuse to feel close once they finally decided to go to sleep. Maybe they got to know each other a little better, Yuuji learning slowly just where to touch and what he could do, and that, yes, things could be just as good the second time.

Or maybe those things didn't happen.

Either way, morning came. The occupants of the room drifted slowly through the start to a new day. All movements were tethered, unhurried. With the window blinds closed and solid walls all around, it made it impossible to know what exact time it was.

Eventually, the two of them sat around the main table. Nagisa poked at the table's surface with a silver fork while Yuuji listened.

"So yeah, that's pretty much it," Nagisa said. The young man looked sleek in his blue shirt and vest, sleeves folded crisply at the edges. "My assignments come to me from a variety of clients. They're sort of…forwarded, I guess you could say. I get a description, an objective, and a price offer. Usually, since I'm rather top-tier, jobs only come to me as a sort of last resort. I look through the details and then decide whether or not to accept the target."

Yuuji nodded slightly. He watched Nagisa seated there on the other side of the table, the young man's gaze angled down as he thought, a soft smile on his lips as he talked to Yuuji about things regarding his life. Yuuji's heart warmed a little at the sight. He could get used to this…

"But I don't get it," Yuuji heard himself reply. "How do you know? I mean," he swept his hand through the air for a second, at a loss to explain himself. "About whether or not you should take it?"

Nagisa frowned. "Generally, it's a good idea to accept most of the jobs that come my way," he said carefully. "There aren't actually that many in this business. And given how good I can be, I almost feel like it's my duty to accept what assignments people see fit to give me specifically."

"Right, right," Yuuji said. "I just mean, uh…" He struggled for a moment, unsure how to express a thought that he didn't even really understand himself. "How do you know?" he asked. "That you're really doing the right thing?"

Nagisa's response was a blank stare. Immediately, Yuuji felt stupid. That gaze reminded him plainly that this business wasn't really one in which those questions were asked.

"I-I mean," said Yuuji, raising his hands in surrender, "You've been doing this for a while, right? But the Nagisa I knew from back then, he wouldn't just go out and kill people willy-nilly. S-So I guess I just assumed…"

Nagisa was quiet for a moment. "You'd be surprised, Yuuji," he said, his voice holding a little more harshness in it than Yuuji was used to. Nagisa stabbed the tip of his fork down into the polished wood. "Some people deserve to die."

A soft knock sounded throughout the room.

"I'll get it," Yuuji said on automatic, his attention redirected before he could even begin to form a response. He got up to answer the door.

Yuuji reached the entryway in just a few strides, once again finding himself standing in front of the doorknob. "Hello?" he called through the wood, pressing one eye up to the peephole.

There was a man standing outside. From where Yuuji looked out over the top of his head, the man's face seemed to be hidden. He stood at about average height, face tilted slightly downward and his eyes obscured by the ensuing curtain of light-colored hair. Its hue looked almost orange in the hallway light. Yuuji frowned. Was it dyed? Yuuji couldn't tell. The man's hair was long, hanging in wavy strands right down to his ears. He wore a nondescript suit and formal tie. As far as Yuuji could tell he was alone, but that was no reason for Yuuji to drop his guard. As Yuuji watched, the man's mouth dropped open.

"Class E," the man said, his voice muffled by the barrier.

Yuuji blinked, body stock-still with suspicion. "What?"

"Class E," the man repeated. He sounded slightly annoyed, as if urging the listener to just hurry up already.

There was a light clatter from behind Yuuji. He turned to see Nagisa rising from his chair. "Who is that?" the young man asked.

Yuuji's mouth moved empty around syllables for a moment. "I… Some guy." He made a useless gesture towards the door and squinted back through the looking glass. "Weird blonde hair?"

"Did he say Class E?"

Yuuji frowned at Nagisa. "Uhh, yeah."

Nagisa's blue eyes were clear as he gazed back. "Let him in."

Still feeling a bit off-kilter somewhere deep inside, Yuuji undid the locks and opened the door. The blonde man entered, giving Yuuji a single polite nod as he passed.

The stranger's face lit up once he saw Nagisa. "Hey, Shoreline!" he called out, his voice far more upbeat and charismatic than Yuuji would have guessed at. A grin flitted across the man's lips. "Heard you had another great showing tonight. Honestly, you ever think of leaving some of those jobs for the other guys?"

Nagisa dipped his head in a nod. "Maehara," he greeted politely.

Yuuji's face creased with confusion. His gaze flicked to this Maehara person, then to Nagisa, and then back. Was Nagisa expecting someone? Had they made some sort of pre-arranged agreement to meet here? Even after everything that had just happened? Yuuji cast a glance over at Nagisa. He never told Yuuji that…

Nagisa looked up and smiled at him. "Yuuji, you might want to make sure that door is locked."

Yuuji rushed to do as he said, moving on automatic. Once he turned back around, the other men were sitting down at the table, Maehara relaxing deep into his seat and setting his feet up on the chair beside him. After a moment's hesitation, Yuuji joined them.

"So, Maehara," Nagisa began. "I assume you're here with it?"

"Of course," Maehara sighed, his posture indicating that he had no desire whatsoever to rush through this conversation. "Geez. Put on this uncomfortable suit, flirted my way past security, hung out doing nothing until now, all to make the final delivery. You know how hard it is being a runner for you guys? Bringing you cash, information, whatever you need… It isn't easy charming my way into every place." His voice pitched up to a whine. "Hell, I don't even have the time to pick up girls anymore!"

Nagisa brought a wry smile to his face. "That must be so hard for you."

"Shut it," Maehara replied, although his tone was similarly lighthearted. "But good job on this one. You've earned the reward a few times over." He winked at Nagisa knowingly, indicating the room around them with one finger. "Almost screwed up on the landing, but eh, the deed got done."

Maehara continued to boast. "With that guy's career in shambles, all those donations he used to give to shady channels will almost certainly dry up. I bet the anti-human-trafficking organizations would thank you for it. Uh, if they knew, that is."

"Human-" Yuuji's eyes widened. That was worse than Yuuji had thought. So this mission hadn't been just a politically-blocking move—there was more to it. Nagisa hadn't mentioned anything about that part.

But Nagisa didn't look at him. The young man's gaze stayed focused on Maehara. "And?"

Maehara shrugged. "And nothing," he replied. "The terms of contract were satisfied. Given the state you left that guy in, I doubt he'll be bothering anyone ever again. Anyway…"

Maehara's tone became serious for once, the man reaching and pawing around inside a pocket hidden somewhere on the inside of his jacket. When he withdrew his hand, it was holding a thick roll of 10,000 yen bills. "Here it is. The reward."

He handed it over to Nagisa, Nagisa stretching out one hand to meet him in the middle. "You made a killing again, today. Impressive."

Nagisa accepted the bundle without a word. He set the bills on the table, flipping through them quickly but methodically, counting them with a pace that spoke of having done this dozens of times before.

Meanwhile Yuuji watched from the side of the table farthest away from them both. He couldn't seem to stop staring. It wasn't the most amount of money Yuuji had ever seen in one place, but still, even for him, it was up there. _Cash for kills_ , the sudden phrase floated through Yuuji's mind. _Cash for kills_. Trading paper for human life. A twist ran through his stomach.

Yuuji grit his teeth. Stupid. There probably hadn't been any human life snuffed out yesterday. Although—a jolt ran through Yuuji as he thought—given the blonde's words, Yuuji realized that he couldn't be sure. Yuuji sat there, a tangling sensation squirming in his gut. Why was he feeling like this? He hadn't been conflicted over things earlier. Not when he first heard about Nagisa's job, not when he had first processed what being an assassin would mean, and not when they were young, either! So why… What had changed?

At last, Nagisa tapped the bills together against the table, all of them together in one big stack. "Everything's here," he said, "not that I doubted."

Maehara nodded at the confirmation of delivery. He stretched his arms above his head and then stood, pushing his chair out behind him. "Welp, I'd better go," he sighed. "I've got a date later."

Nagisa nodded in recognition. "Thank you, Maehara," Nagisa said, his voice holding genuine goodwill. "I appreciate you doing this, as always."

Maehara shrugged and gave a grin. "Eh, it's a lucrative part-time job. And hey, who could you trust more than a member of our very own E Class?" He winked. With one last passing look at Yuuji, Maehara turned to leave.

Once in the doorway, Maehara paused. "Oh. Almost forgot."

He turned back to look at the two of them. "You've got another visitor coming. He's very much looking forward to seeing you, so don't leave quite yet."

Yuuji felt his confusion grow deeper. He shot a glance at Nagisa, and wasn't sure whether he was relieved or frightened to find a puzzled frown on the other man's face as well.

With that, Maehara left, throwing a jaunty wave behind him.

* * *

Yuuji blinked, staring at the person who had just walked in through the door, feeling the slow, maroon wave of self-loathing and understanding wash over him. Oh. Of course. He should have known.

"Yo, Nagisa," said Karma Akabane, his hair a dark crimson, lips pulled up into a sneer, his posture curved like a panther's. "I see you're just as short as ever."

Karma was an intimidating sight after all these years, Yuuji realized. His hair was the same shade of red, although now cut short and styled in a way that reminded Yuuji almost of a pinwheel. Even so, it still came off as something calculated, professional. His amber eyes glinted, but it wasn't the color so much as the feeling behind them that made memories stir in the back of Yuuji's mind. They were sharp, intelligent, and every bit as dangerous as when he had first seen them. Karma was also taller now—taller than Yuuji, taller than most people by far. It didn't seem to make any difference to the man, but as far as Yuuji could tell, he had grown into it. Karma's shoulders were dropped, holding himself at the ready, every inch of him broadcasting confidence underneath a thin veneer of holding back for the other party's sake. The man wore a plain black suit. Somehow, the sight of such a wild personality contained within that corporate getup made Yuuji feel even more on edge.

While Karma's clothing spoke of professionalism, the look on his face screamed mischief. When he grinned too wide, Yuuji could see the edges of pointed teeth poking out from beneath his top lip, like barely-hidden fangs. He wondered if Karma was aware of that. Knowing Karma, he probably was.

Yuuji fought to suppress an instinctive gasp of breath when Karma's gaze swept to him. "Oh, hey," Karma addressed him. "It's been a while. Yuuji, right? I see he's made every effort to include his dear boyfriend, as usual."

Yuuji's face colored slightly, and he opened his mouth to sputter out a denial but then closed it as he realized that he couldn't. He and Nagisa were officially in a relationship now, so 'boyfriends' was technically what they were. He hated having to bow down to Karma on any issue, but in this case it was true.

"Karma," Nagisa greeted their new arrival. "This is a surprise." The blue-haired man frowned as if another thought just occurred to him. "And I'm not short."

"Uh-huh. Is that why you look so much different from way up here?" Karma replied, voice crackling with dry wit.

Nagisa pouted, adopting a haughty expression and turning up his nose. "And how might the weather be up there, may I ask? I'm sure it's very different, seeing as you seem to be entering an entirely different dimension."

Karma bit out a laugh, coming to sit down in one of the comfy living room chairs. "Yeah, it's wacky. I'm starting to get the proportions of my old man… But never mind all that." He gave Nagisa a grin that was half-smile, half-smirk, and all heart. "I heard your mission last night was a success."

Nagisa tried to hide it, but a proud smile lifted the corner of his mouth for one second. "Yes. That's what everybody who has come here has been saying."

Yuuji stared back and forth between the two of them, sitting on a chair to the side. He tried not to become overwhelmed. So many things were happening without him recently. And it seemed as if all of it only had to do with him on the outskirts.

"Anyway," Karma said. The three of them were now gathered together in the living room, taking advantage of the soft armchairs. The atmosphere grew cozy between them, almost like a meeting of old friends. Although, given that Karma and Nagisa made two out of three, that description actually wasn't too far off.

Karma indicated Nagisa with one lazy finger. "What do you mean 'this is a surprise'? Am I not allowed to reconnect with an old classmate? Especially considering that you've been gone for more than a few years by now. I know those chaps overseas are mighty interesting, but honestly, Nagisa, where's your national pride?"

Nagisa smiled back. He knew that Karma was joking. "I was busy," the young man explained. "You knew that I was safe."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything," Karma complained. "Weren't you ever planning on sending something more than a postcard? More than a text?"

Nagisa's eyes flicked guiltily over to Yuuji for an invisible second before returning to Karma. "I never sent any postcards."

"It was a figure of speech!"

Their conversation continued on, eventually drawing Yuuji into it too. It was all pleasant talk, catching up and swapping stories, three different lives coming together all in one place and wanting to remark upon it. Yuuji almost didn't notice, but as time went on he drifted ever-closer to the edge of his chair. Nagisa looked as if he would have been perfectly complete with some tea in this moment. And Karma sat relaxed, one foot propped up on opposite knee.

They talked and talked and talked, but like all groups, eventually reached a long-term lull in the conversation.

"So, now what?" Karma said, breaking the silence. "I just came to see you, but believe it or not, for once it's not like I actually have a plan beyond that." He raised an eyebrow at Nagisa. "Although if you think I'm gonna let go of one of my best friends so soon after such a long time, you've got another thought coming."

Karma swept one hand toward the rest of the room. "Also, I'm not sure how much longer your—no, his—room reservation lasts, but we might need to take this someplace else eventually."

"Ah!" Nagisa gasped. Then a sheepish expression rose across his face. "True." Privately, Yuuji thought it was kind of cute. A prick of amusement ran through his heart. How funny it was, to watch an elite assassin be caught off-guard like that. Had Nagisa really not noticed?

 _Assassin._ The word swept cold fingers through the pit of Yuuji's stomach before he could prepare himself.

Karma brushed one hand through his hair. "Well, what should we do?" he asked, voice slightly gruff. "I don't know about you two, but going from one hotel straight to another sounds kinda pathetic to me. And I don't know if there are any parks around here that would be secure enough for an extended conversation. Although I guess the first option's a possibility, if that's what it comes to…"

In the ensuing awkward silence, Yuuji cast a glance around. Some sort of decision felt like it solidified itself in the back of his mind. He cleared his throat, taking a small breath. "I've got an idea," he announced.

Two pairs of eyes turned to him, calming blue and curious amber.

"Why don't you both just come to my place?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [READ THE SEQUEL AT "FOUND ME AGAIN", LINK HERE: http://archiveofourown.org/works/7297621 ]
> 
> Thank you all so much for the amazing support, and I hope you all stay interested through the third installment!
> 
> * Karma's line about his way-too-lanky proportions is a reference to a certain fan-theory about his true parents…and it's a reference to Matsui Yuusei's other most notable work, so if you caught that, congratulations!
> 
> A short playlist for this fic:  
> When We Were Young – Adele (Madilyn Baily cover)  
> This Town - Niall Horan (or Kurt Hugo Schneider cover)  
> Undisclosed Desires - Muse  
> Do You Remem8er Me? – Homestuck vol. 8  
> Nine Lives One Love – Homestuck vol. Colours and Mayhem  
> This Love - Taylor Swift  
> QUESTION – Assassination Classroom Season 2, 1st OP  
> See You Again – Whiz Kalifa


End file.
